Miscellaneous

Vaxxed and Relaxxed (Soon!)

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I’M FULLY VACCINATED! Let the world tour begin. But for real, I have been stalking flights basically daily since my 2-weeks-from-2nd-vax-mark. As they say on Instagram… vaxxed and waxed baby!!! Except I got laser hair removal, but, same diff.

  • Shot 1 (Check those nails!)
  • Shot 2 (New Sticker, New Nails)

I was vaccinated at the Javits Center both times #TeamPfizer. I’ve gone through a lot of emotions at Javits. That seems like a weird thing to say about a convention center, but it’s true. The first time I went there was for the Barbri practice Bar exam. I was terrified. The second time was for the actual Bar Exam. Terrified doesn’t even begin to describe the emotions. Petrified is more like it. Then, I went back in 2019 for the NYC Marathon Expo. I was terrified again, but also excited. I had a little bit of PTSD from the Bar. But this time, for the very first time, I wasn’t scared at all. I was RELIEVED. It’s been *a year*, I think we can all agree. After receiving the vaccine, I went to a waiting area for a few minutes where they had a Wall of Thanks for us to write notes to thank anyone and everyone who made this day possible. And that’s when it really hit me how lucky I really am. None of my family or friends died. I didn’t lose my job. I have always had enough food. Millions of people cannot say the same. So I am relieved, but I am also so incredibly grateful. For the healthcare workers, the grocery store employees, the national guard who mobilized to make it a smooth experience, to the politicians who have made it possible for nearly 15 MILLION New Yorkers to have already been vaccinated. And for the SCIENTISTS.

  • The National Guard had everything SO well-organized.
  • Lines on lines on lines
  • NO VAX PICS ALLOWED!
  • So many shots/day
  • My thank you note…
  • And so many others!

For a state as large as New York, it’s pretty miraculous that it’s not even May, but 46% of our population has had at least one shot, and 32% of us are fully vaccinated. I’m a bit salty that they now have walk-in appointments at the Natural History Museum because… um, HOW COOL IS THAT??? And my friend in Florida got vaccinated at Publix, where getting vaccines is a pleasure (IYKYK). I kind of wish I got a PubSub (chicken tenders of course) along with my vax, but beggars can’t be choosers.

And now, the world is my oyster! Not exactly, because like, Canada is still closed. And Australia has a 2-week quarantine. And the EU is… not really here for Americans just yet. However, news broke yesterday that they will welcome us back soon!

I know different people are comfortable with different levels of things even if they are vaccinated. I’m still wearing two masks to the grocery store. And I’m not gonna lie, I’m still wary of crowds and groups. I haven’t even dined inside yet! But If I double mask on a plane and I’m double vaxxed, I am ready to GTFO of New York. I have officially booked 2 trips and a third is on the way! My parents haven’t traveled anywhere yet, but I’ve realized that when I call the home phone line now, there isn’t always someone there to pick up! It’s been over a year since that has been the case.

My mom and I canceled a trip last year because of Covid, and I can’t wait to travel somewhere with her again. But first, I’m actually going to their house for a week! Working from home has its perks, as I mentioned last week. And then… who knows!? I have a 4-day weekend for Shavuot (thanks, #JewJob). I have a 4-day weekend for Memorial Day/My Birthday. I booked a trip to Aruba with Chris in June. We are ready to relax in a place that is not our home. The real question is… will my Peloton miss me? More on my fav quarantine purchase later this week.

For now… where are you going first? Your parents’ house? To see your new grandkids? Cancun? Let me know in the comments.

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Long Legs and other Personal Problems

WFH Advantages – I kinda don’t wanna go back?

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Today is my 4 year blogiversary! It’s also been 13 months to the day since I started working from home. Somehow, I’ve never talked about it here on the blog. I talked about living with to-be-in-laws, and about being engaged and quarantined, but not the actual experience of working from home.

If you had asked me on March 16, 2020 how I felt about it, I would have said no. No way. Absolutely not. I’m a VERY social person and I love my coworkers and I love the feeling of having lunch with someone else. Also, I cannot even IMAGINE being in the same house as my fiancé 24 hours a day.

But now??? I’m not sure if I feel that way. As people get vaccinated slowly (more on that another day), workplaces are starting to talk about the transition back into in-person work and honestly? I’m not excited about it. I still miss my coworkers, but I kind of love working from home.

First of all, the commute. I love the subway. Really, I do. It’s quick, efficient, and it’s an inexpensive means of transportation. But when you put the experience of being sweaty and hurried, and pushed against 1000 other sweaty and hurried people in a cattle car versus the experience of literally rolling out of bed to the kitchen for coffee and a laptop?? I mean, I think we can all agree that the latter sounds more appealing. I mentioned the coffee, but also the breakfast. I think I have made eggs 95% of the days we have been home. To be honest, I also made eggs 95% of the days I commuted to work, but it usually involved being late, eating while standing up in the kitchen and packing a bag, and feeling like even putting my plate in the dishwasher was going to make me later. Now? I can wait to eat breakfast until after my 9 am meeting. Or after my 10 am meeting. Or whenever!! And the dishes can be put in the dishwasher while I’m on a call. No one can see me and I’m in my house!

Also, shoes. Don’t get me wrong, I love shoes. I have approximately 20 pairs of boots. But this year I discovered the joy of socks. And slippers. Or just no shoes at all. When all you do is pace around your bedroom on phone calls, real shoes are not necessary. In fact, I instituted a no-shoes-in-the-apartment policy. It’s easy because we leave so infrequently! Also, I mostly only wear sneakers so our shoe rack by the door can remain half full.

When you saw this blog title, you probably assumed I would talk about working out. You would have been correct. It’s the best part. Even before I got my Peloton, I was able to do workouts midday. Whether that was a step class during my lunch hour or a quick run when the sun was brightest and I could get the tannest, the fact that I could go home to shower before my next call made it lifechanging. Now, I sometimes do a 20-minute arm workout between calls. Or a 5-minute core workout before I make lunch. Sometimes, I go on a 30-minute run and I don’t even go home. I just continue to my next phone call and go on a low-impact walk. Which leads me to my next discovery – taking phone calls outside. I really hope that this continues even when they force me back to the office. Pre-covid, I spent hours of my day on the phone. When Covid began, all those calls shifted to zoom which was incredibly exhausting. Now, we are finally transitioning back to the age of phone calls, and the ability to go on walks while on work calls is amazing. I focus more on the conversation when my legs are moving, and I can breathe fresh air.

And finally, my sweet fiancé. I haven’t been without him for a full 24 hours in over a year. I used to travel without him for work and play, but now, it’s been 16 months since we have slept apart! I am going to go to my parents’ house for 5 days next month and it’ll be so strange not to have him there. That leads me to my last point – working from home means I can work from anywhere. Obviously, I took full advantage of that at the beginning of the pandemic when we moved temporarily (for 6 months) to Texas. And unfortunately, the challenge and lack of safety of travel has affected the real extent to which I have been able to take advantage of this. But I hope that in the future, our work environment is more flexible and we will have certain times in the office and certain times remote, so I can travel to different places, even if it means working for 8 hours and then exploring a new place in the evening. This flexibility of working without being strapped to a desk is an exciting new possibility.

How do you guys feel about working from home? Hate it? Love it? Scared to go back but also excited? Let me know in the comments.

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Miscellaneous

Covid Anniversary

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It’s March! Happy Anniversary… to Covid! Of course, I am being facetious. It has been a horrific year and guess what? It’s not getting better. If you were expecting a fun and light blog, then you should close this and go to someone else’s blog because this post is going to be truthful and the truth is… THIS SUCKS Y’ALL.

Monday was the first day of March and I had myself a cute little breakdown. Anyone else? If you ask me, things are worse now than they were.

First of all, the burnout is REAL. Every additional day I live like this is exponentially worse. It’s like compound interest but way less fun because I am not getting rich.

Second of all, seeing people on social media still just going about their business like things are fine is THE ABSOLUTE WORST.

Third of all, the virus is, quite literally, worse! 6 months ago, the numbers were low, the virus “couldn’t pass through a mask” so we went about our business at the grocery store or on a walk, with a single mask. Just one! There were stories about full hair salons being spared from transmission by a measly fabric mask.

Now, with new strains of the virus every few weeks, to leave the house I suit up like a space man. I put on a huge coat (thanks SNOWPOCOLYSE 2021) and an N95, and a cotton mask on top of that. And boots. Because endless winter is also a thing, I guess. I feel like I should be wearing goggles, too, but I just can’t.

“BUT DON’T YOU HAVE HOPE?? Things have gotten better! Things are opening up! There’s a vaccine! Multiple!” – People with Hope

Let me tell you about the two groups of people who have hope:

  1. The vaccinated people. Yep, you. I’m not shaming you for having the vaccine. It is awesome. Am I jealous? Of course! But also, sir/ma’am, that is why you have hope. Because for YOU, it is better. You are “safe.” I am not. I also have very little hope of getting the vaccine soon. Sure, Biden says we will have enough supply by the end of May. But by the time they actually figure out supply chain issues and coordinated vaccinations, it will be months after that. Then wait another month for the second shot (or maybe we all get J&J), and then wait another two weeks until it actually becomes effective. We are looking at July at best. And I highly, highly doubt that. Not to mention how long it will be until things like Broadway shows open again.
  2. The people who have let their guard down. I see you. Going to running clubs “outside because it’s safe” in groups of 8+ people with NO MASKS. I see you going to Mexico and Antigua, because you “got tested first.” I see you traveling to see family members because you haven’t seen them in a long time. None of us have! I see you celebrating a coworker’s birthday with a “small group” of 7 people at a Hibachi table. I see you, and I’m judging you. But also, I have come to terms with the fact that not everyone is taking the virus as seriously as I have. It’s been that way from the jump. The thing I hate about this particular group, however, is the fact that they have hope. They say, “things are getting better!” and couple it with this behavior. Things are NOT in fact getting better, you are just getting more lackadaisical about protocol. I’m glad you aren’t burned out anymore, but it’s only because you’re not actually being safe anymore.

Here’s another reason why I’ve been much more depressed this month versus 2 months ago: people have started to make plans, or expect you to make plans. The people making these plans are the same ones in groups 1 and 2 above. The “things will definitely be better by June” crowd. Well guess what, they probably won’t. And I refuse to make plans for June because it’s too dang depressing.

Here’s a great example. My mom, love her, wanted to put a zoom event on the calendar for the last week of June. I had three options:

  1. Say no. I will probably be vaccinated then and the second I can travel safely again, I am OUT OF HERE.
  2. Say yes. This sh*t will be going on FOREVER so may as well just zoom until the end of time. But I already zoom 8 hours a day EVERY SINGLE DAY so that is VERY depressing.
  3. Not answer because I am pretty sure the real situation will be #2 and I just cannot wrap my head around doing this for many more months.

Guess which option I took?

Anyway, y’all, I miss my friends.

I have no hope.

The end.

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Big City Living

Crying In NYC

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It’s beginning to look a lot like… we’ll be staying in the house for Christmas. That’s not exactly how the song goes, but we are still deep into this global pandemic and it’s not looking like it will clear up by Christmas, or New Years (or Easter 2020, as some people may have thought).

It sure has been a depressing year. Trips canceled. Lonely in-apartment nights. Enough DoorDash delivery to keep the restaurant business afloat (almost). And I don’t need to remind you of my own personal tragedy, being canceled last minute from the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade.

If you’re feeling like you need a good cry, and these constantly streaming Hallmark movies aren’t doing it for ya crying in the house, then this blog is for you. I compiled a list of great places to cry in NYC. I started brainstorming this list 7 long years ago, before I quit my job as an attorney. Back when I was practicing law, I cried in public at least 5 times a week. I don’t know if I’d say I’m proud of this fact, but I do think it qualifies me as a bit of an expert.

Recently, even Meghan Markle commented on this phenomenon in the New York Times. She said,

[My cab driver] explained that New Yorkers live out their personal lives in public spaces. “We love in the city, we cry in the street, our emotions and stories there for anybody to see,” I remember him telling me. “Don’t worry, somebody on that corner will ask her if she’s OK.”

Sometimes that’s true. People ask if you’re ok. But most times? They’re too busy to notice. Which is great for me, because I usually don’t want anyone asking me about why I’m crying. I just need a good cry, ya know? Let’s start with the one the Duchess of Sussex witnessed.

The Sidewalk

New Yorkers walk everywhere. So it only makes sense that our cry-fest begins here. We are on our way somewhere. Deep in thought, deep in podcast or playlist, and all of a sudden, a deep depression hits. Do we wait to get somewhere enclosed? Hell no. We let it out on the street corner. Most of the time, we’re walking too quickly for anyone to see our tears. Or it’s winter and they’re frozen to our cheeks anyway. If, god forbid, we are stopped at a traffic light (and there’s actual traffic… because if there isn’t we’re jaywalking), then someone may see our tears. Not to fear, there is likely someone much more interesting on that corner asking for weed money on singing very loudly for all to hear. What if we don’t make it to the sidewalk in time??

The Elevator

This is a classic. Perfect for a quick cry. It’s isolated, enclosed, and feels like a womb. It often smells like urine or some residual curry, but not to worry, once the tears are flowing, your nose will clog up anyway. Main issue with the elevator cry is when you think you’re home free on a solo trip and then it stops and a random person gets in. Thankfully, normal human elevator etiquette is to stare at the wall and make zero eye contact until getting off to say, “have a good day.” Tears do not usually derail this social contract.

In the Lobby to Your Doorman

This is usually reserved for drunken tears. This should be our LAST RESORT. Let me repeat, do not do this regularly. You need to face this human the next day. And the next. You need to pretend you are just a normal happy person who orders from the same Chinese delivery place 3 times per week. Better to not cry in front of your doorman. However, if you MUST speak to someone about your tears and drunk dialing your parents is not an option, it’s best to cry to your doorman after 2 am. Then the doorman knows you’re just drunk and gives you a free pass (even if you’re not, I suggest pretending). ONE FREE PASS, GUYS, use it wisely.

In a Crowd

This is hit or miss. If it’s a crowd of New Yorkers, they will likely not bat an eye. New Yorkers DGAF about you, and even if they did, they probably don’t at the moment because they are too focused on why there is a crowd, and annoyed at how big it is, because they have places to be. If it’s a crowd of tourists, you are in for a bumpy and intrusive ride. Tourists always ask too many questions. During Covid, I do not recommend even being near a crowd, so let’s take a rain check on this one for now.

On the Subway

HIGHLY recommend this. First of all, pre-pandemic, subways were crowded and nobody looked at anybody. Even in the pandemic, people are reading Kindles, listening to music, trying to breathe as little as possible and not touch anything. A lot of concentration is involved. Nobody bothers you on the subway. On the off chance that a homeless man tries to comfort you (this happened to me in 2014), it will at least make for a fabulous Facebook status.

At a Bakery

Guys, this is fool-proof. You’re already there buying sweets for yourself so the assumption is that you’re depressed or PMS-ing. Why not add some tears for good measure? It almost makes more sense to be crying in a bakery than to have dry eyes. Plus, that banana pudding is just SO DELICIOUS, they may be tears of joy.

At Home

Pre-pandemic, I wouldn’t necessarily recommend this. Your roommates or significant other will ask questions. It’s too intimate. You’ll need to pretend you were watching an episode of This Is Us, even if you’re clearly watching Great British Bakeoff. But during Covid times?? We need to normalize crying at home. First and foremost, crying with a mask on is not fun. It’s messy. It’s runny. The snot combines with the saliva and then you wipe it with your mask which gets wet, and then gets cold and freezes, it’s just not a good idea. So if you don’t want to cry with a mask, that leaves one option.

Perhaps just this year, let’s cry at home. But once these vaccines start rolling out, we will be crying and mourning this lost year for many months to come. Bookmark this page and be ready to let the tears go.

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Travel

Lake Tyler Covid Getaway

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Well guys, it’s been 6 months of quarantine/social distancing. SIX. MONTHS. HALF A YEAR. How is it possible that I feel SO TIRED from doing ABSOLUTELY NOTHING?? I know I am coming in strong with the all-caps. I promise to calm down. I wanted a great way to express my frustration with 2020. Yelling via capital letters seemed fitting.

After 5 months of sitting in the house, my fiancé and I decided we needed a weekend away. Or rather, I decided I needed a weekend away, and he said he’d come with me. I promised to do all of the work as long as he split the cost. I know there are people out in Instagram-land who are now comfortable traveling by land or by plane, gathering with friends, renting houses together, going to the beach together etc., but the more I look at the science and facts about Covid, the less comfortable I am doing any of those things, which limited the scope of my “weekend away” plans. I had three goals in mind:

  1. Change of Pace/Change of Place
  2. Alone
  3. On the water.

For the past 6 months, we have been staying at my fiancé’s family’s house. Don’t get me wrong, we are thankful. It is beyond generous that they have allowed us to stay this long. But I have not lived with kids or parent-figures in 15 years. And I have lived ALONE with my boyfriend for more than 3 years. It is not the same to have kids running around asking if I’m working (yes, it’s Monday), or if I can play (no, I’m working). There are also (cough cough) certain parts of a relationship that are difficult when there are 6 other people constantly in the house.

And as for a change of place on the water… I really miss the beach. I am a Florida girl at heart, and despite not living by the beach for a decade in New York, I ALWAYS make at least 2 trips to the beach per year. Sometimes it’s the Jersey Shore, sometimes it’s Greece and Italy. Being land-locked in a state larger than most countries has felt a bit like being in jail. I missed the water. A lot.

I went on VRBO and started looking for waterfront properties within 5 hours driving distance of our house. I set a budget of $400/night. If there was a hammock, it got extra points. I whittled my list to 5 properties and sent it to Chris to pick. (This a strategic thing I always do, so that if the property ends up being bad I can blame him. But if it’s great then of course it’s because I put the list together!) On the list, I had a few lake-front properties in Texas and Louisiana, and one in Galveston on the Gulf of Mexico. We went with a place in Whitehouse, Texas, on Lake Tyler, which was only 2 hours from our home. It was $199/night and only slept 2 people – perfect! Our plans were almost ruined when the dueling hurricanes in the Gulf threatened to hit our place, and I felt very lucky that Chris picked a property in Texas, not Louisiana. Go Chris!

We drove to the house after work on Thursday, and thankfully Chris drove so I could snack. Sure, the drive was only 2 hours, but I packed enough road trip snacks for an approximately 24-hour drive. We hit a slight roadblock when Google Maps led us to a road where there was no house with the number on it. Thankfully, the property owner picked up his phone right away and explained there were TWO roads with the same name. After a 15-minute detour, we got the right place and unpacked our things.

If you are looking for a blog about all of the things we did on our vacation weekend, you won’t find one, because we did NOTHING and it was GLORIOUS. Most of the time was spent sitting outside on the covered deck. Eating meals. Reading books. Listening to music. Reading more. Listening to an audio book. Watching Love Island. Eating some more and lounging around. It was fabulous.

  • Every morning.
  • Coffee and fresh air, nothing like it.
  • But are we cute? DUH.
  • Thumbs up for lazy days.
  • You can find me with my Kindle and Pina Colada.

I am a HUGE Fitbit fan, and despite working from home, I have been trying to keep up with my 10,000/day step goal since social distancing began. The last day I had not met my 10K goal was April 6th. The first day at the lake I got 3.9K steps. And I was proud of that.

The second full day we were there, we did a few activities. We rented paddle boards from the owner of the house, I floated around in blow-up floats I bought from Amazon for the weekend while we listened to country music on our Sonos speaker, and then we played Corn Hole on the owner’s lawn. There were so many games in the house including mega-Jenga, Horseshoes, Poker, and cards. We played a few rounds of Phase 10 in between episodes of Love Island.

Not to be corny, but it felt like we were on our own love island! The house itself was AMAZING. We didn’t know at the time of booking, but it was set back behind the owner’s house, completely separate from his home, and surrounded on all four sides by water. It was fully renovated with a dishwasher and bathroom and water views from every room. Also, there was a covered and uncovered deck. The décor was adorable, with “Lake Life” and “Lake House” accents everywhere. Also, it was tricked out! They had a state-of-the-art dishwasher/fridge/ice machine/blender/convection stovetop, fully stocker Keurig, etc. They even had a wine cooler. There was an Apple TV (we brought our own, because duh), and a Bluetooth speaker we could bring onto the deck (we also brought our own because duh), and I wish I could have stayed there a whole week.

The only issue with Covid “vacationing” is the food. We had to BYO everything and we weren’t sure about the availability of delivery. Especially in Texas, we wanted to limit our time in grocery stores/anywhere in the sticks where people are less likely to wear masks. There were many trips back and forth from the car; 3 meals a day for two people is a lot of groceries! Not to mention a case of beer and pina colada mix. To make cooking easier than it is at home, I made Chris sit down and meal-plan with me before we left. We had options for each meal. Breakfast: eggs/cinnamon rolls/sausage. Lunch: Sandwiches/grilled cheese/tacos. Dinner: Burgers/Frozen Pizza/Chicken Parm. Cooking was easier with only 2 people’s dishes and a dishwasher. For some reason it felt WAY simpler than cooking at home.

  • Breakfast
  • More Breakfast
  • More Lunch
  • Dinner
  • More Dinner
Covid Vacation Home Cooking

The owner was available for any questions all the time, and we saw him a few times when he came down to take his boat out (not included in the house LOL), but he always texted first to warn us. Also, he gave us a better deal on the paddleboards than he advertised on his listing, and provided life jackets, which was nice of him. He was kind enough to mention to me that we just missed the Trump Boat Parade the weekend before. (Not the infamous one from last weekend. See pics below, there were still plenty of boats left with flags on them.). Chris lost his Goodr sunglasses in the lake and I left my flip flops on the grass (guess I had too many ciders playing corn hole) but besides those two losses, we had only wins and successes. My best friend had been telling me for months how important it was for mental health to get away and have a change of pace; I should have listened to her earlier.

We booked one more weekend trip for this upcoming weekend, our LAST weekend in Texas! This time, we got a BIG house, lakefront again, and we’re bringing the whole family as a last hoorah! I can’t wait to share more with you about it. And if you’re ever in the Lake Tyler area in Texas, I’ll send you the VRBO listing, I can’t recommend it enough!

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Miscellaneous

Top Golf Social Distance Date

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I asked you guys for social distance date ideas 2.5 months ago and we finally went on one! Needless to say, my Bullet Journal Goal of one out-of-house date night/month has not been being achieved. Another Covid casualty. We went to Top Golf and had a blast! Hopefully the fun we had will last me another 2.5 months. It met all of our criteria for a date: relatively close-by, open air, masks mandatory, fun, out of the house.

By the way, when I asked for your advice for date ideas, NONE OF YOU COMMENTED. What’s up with that??? Thankfully, I asked my Instagram followers on my private Instagram a week later, and I got a few great ideas. We didn’t do any of these (yet), but I wanted to post them here in case you are looking for things to do. Ya know, since you won’t find any in the comments of my last post.

  • Puzzle night
  • Top chef cook off, quarantine style, use only what’s in the kitchen
  • Hiking
  • Slip and slide in the backyard. Along with the kiddie pool, add White Claws for a water park day
  • Bake macarons
  • DIY Paint and Sip (order canvases on Amazon)
  • Drive-In movie theater
  • Bonfires & Boggle

Anyway, we haven’t done those things yet, but we are now golf pros!! JK, we are both AWFUL. We failed in glorious fashion but we didn’t care.

Since we are currently residing in a Covid hot spot, we wanted to go on a date at an off time. We decided on a weeknight at 9 pm. We made a lane reservation earlier in the day, and I even put on makeup for the occasion! I think the only things that mattered were eyebrows and eyelashes because masks, but it still felt good to have a reason to put on a bra. A real one. That I don’t pull over my head (what!?)

Top Golf required masks in all inside areas, which meant you needed one to check in (contactless) and to walk through the lobby to your outside lane. Every person working there was wearing a mask at all times, over mouth AND nose. Yes, I need to specify that here in Texas. I was impressed. The inside bar was closed, and the bathroom doors were propped open and facilities were being obsessively cleaned. Even the clubs were being sanitized between each lane turnover.

The actual golf lane did not require masks, and between each lane they had floor to ceiling clear tarps, sort of like shower curtain liners. It felt very safe. On the actual greens there were no tarps between, and most people were not wearing masks once in their lanes, so I just staggered my putts when someone was on the green in the lane next to ours. In bowling, that’s common courtesy so I didn’t mind. By the way, I’m MUCH better at bowling.

We both ordered drinks and had them at the table – masks off only when we were behind our tarp! It was really nice to have a drink I didn’t make myself. Even if it cost 5x more than the ones I make at home. It was the first time I had a drink outside the house since March 13th! We decided not to get food, because we were still iffy about the kitchen etc., but it was fabulous to socialize, even to say “thank you” to a waiter (masked, of course).

We took a few photos of each other as well as videos, where I was usually swinging and not even making contact with the ball. Oops. We tried a few selfies. There’s no handing your phone to strangers nowadays, so it’s a good thing I am VERY well-practiced at selfie-taking. I attempted to teach Chris how to smize. He thought it meant opening your eyes as wide as they go. It made for some pretty funny pics.

  • Chris attempting a “smize,” me laughing at him.
  • Both of us “smizing”
  • A cute pic! (Notice our lane neighbor)

Are you wondering when I’m going to tell you our scores? NEVER! We were so bad that at one point we accidentally golfed for each other, and let me tell you, it did not matter. We will not be competing against Tiger any time soon. It was a fabulous date night for my sanity and mental health, not so much for my confidence. If you have a Top Golf near you, they outline their safety precautions for each location online. Feel free to call ahead to ask questions, as well. I recommend it!

Check out that ring!
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Long Legs and other Personal Problems

Pity Party

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It’s ok to not be ok. I hereby welcome you to my Pity Party.

I saw a tweet the other day that said “physically i am two days away from july, emotionally i am still processing February.” This could not be any more real. Like… what the F*&K happened to 2020?? I looked at the calendar the other day and I was like wow… back in January, WHO WOULD HAVE THUNK?!

And here’s the thing, there are a lot of terrible things going on in the world. There is a police brutality crisis, mass incarceration, unemployment, world hunger, and Russian dictators putting bounties on American soldiers. Not to mention 503K deaths worldwide from Covid, and more every day.

But you know what else is going on? NOTHING. At least in my life. And to be completely honest, I have good days and bad days. Last weekend? A lot of bad days. But I had ice cream, which made it a little bit better.

I’m in mourning for the year I thought I was going to have. I had really high hopes! I had goals to visit three new countries. Remember traveling? Another goal: to go to 100 bootcamp classes. Ya know, at the gym. Remember those? And another goal: To book hair for 2 weddings.  Remember weddings? Where people attended IRL and got their hair done?

Speaking of weddings, how about mine?

This is usually around the point where I start to unravel. Not to be overly dramatic, but my entire plan for my life has come undone at this point. And yes, I know it’s only been 4 months of quarantine (so far), but the reality is, we have a LONG road ahead of us. No vaccine on the horizon, no idea when it will be released. When it is, will it be safe? Will it be unfathomably expensive? Will it be widely available? Should it be? We won’t know the long-term side effects; we won’t really know what side effects there are at all. Will you even feel comfortable taking it? And how long until we do feel comfortable? What happens in the meantime?

Back to my life plan – it’s out the window at this point. I feel like Rachel from Friends when she turns 30. (That whole clip is worth watching, by the way.)

In Rachel’s words, “I realized it was stupid to get upset about not having a husband and kids, all I really needed was a plan!” Well we all know what they said about the best laid plans. If you guys don’t watch the clip, the gist is that she wants three kids, starting to have the first one at 35 so she counts backward from there and… spoiler alert, she is already too old for her own plan.

I’m not going to say I live by the Rachel Green’s plan, but the annoying part about this whole pandemic is that a LOT of things have been postponed. Weddings can be pushed off, travel can be rescheduled, engagement parties, brunches, celebrations of all kinds. But you know what Rachel had right? Time marches on and fertility still has an expiration date. Wtf!

Now, this is not a blog about having a baby, and I’m not having one right now anyway, but I’d like to have time before I do. Time to travel without kids. Time to enjoy my engagement. Time to celebrate it. Time to plan a wedding and actually visit venues, to have the opportunity see them with my own eyes. Time to enjoy Girls Nights Out.

When we got engaged, for the three glorious weeks post-engagement and pre-pandemic, people asked if we had a wedding date. (Why? I have no idea. Don’t do that, guys.) Anyway, when I said we didn’t, invariably they said, “That’s great! That’s fine! Enjoy your engagement! It’s the best time.”

Is this “enjoying our engagement?” Is it “the best time?” Living in a house that is not our own, halfway across the country, without the ability to go out on dates, have an engagement party, show off my ring, see my parents? I can’t even get my nails done to show my ring off on Instagram!

So yeah, I’m not ok. Not today, at least. I spent the last three days watching TV and trying to forget real life. It didn’t really work but the ice cream was good. I realize that things could be worse. We are lucky to be employed, safe, healthy, etc. But sometimes I need to throw myself a pity party. Y’all are invited to the next one. It’ll be on Zoom. BYO ice cream.

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