Big City Living

Crying In NYC

5 Comments

It’s beginning to look a lot like… we’ll be staying in the house for Christmas. That’s not exactly how the song goes, but we are still deep into this global pandemic and it’s not looking like it will clear up by Christmas, or New Years (or Easter 2020, as some people may have thought).

It sure has been a depressing year. Trips canceled. Lonely in-apartment nights. Enough DoorDash delivery to keep the restaurant business afloat (almost). And I don’t need to remind you of my own personal tragedy, being canceled last minute from the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade.

If you’re feeling like you need a good cry, and these constantly streaming Hallmark movies aren’t doing it for ya crying in the house, then this blog is for you. I compiled a list of great places to cry in NYC. I started brainstorming this list 7 long years ago, before I quit my job as an attorney. Back when I was practicing law, I cried in public at least 5 times a week. I don’t know if I’d say I’m proud of this fact, but I do think it qualifies me as a bit of an expert.

Recently, even Meghan Markle commented on this phenomenon in the New York Times. She said,

[My cab driver] explained that New Yorkers live out their personal lives in public spaces. “We love in the city, we cry in the street, our emotions and stories there for anybody to see,” I remember him telling me. “Don’t worry, somebody on that corner will ask her if she’s OK.”

Sometimes that’s true. People ask if you’re ok. But most times? They’re too busy to notice. Which is great for me, because I usually don’t want anyone asking me about why I’m crying. I just need a good cry, ya know? Let’s start with the one the Duchess of Sussex witnessed.

The Sidewalk

New Yorkers walk everywhere. So it only makes sense that our cry-fest begins here. We are on our way somewhere. Deep in thought, deep in podcast or playlist, and all of a sudden, a deep depression hits. Do we wait to get somewhere enclosed? Hell no. We let it out on the street corner. Most of the time, we’re walking too quickly for anyone to see our tears. Or it’s winter and they’re frozen to our cheeks anyway. If, god forbid, we are stopped at a traffic light (and there’s actual traffic… because if there isn’t we’re jaywalking), then someone may see our tears. Not to fear, there is likely someone much more interesting on that corner asking for weed money on singing very loudly for all to hear. What if we don’t make it to the sidewalk in time??

The Elevator

This is a classic. Perfect for a quick cry. It’s isolated, enclosed, and feels like a womb. It often smells like urine or some residual curry, but not to worry, once the tears are flowing, your nose will clog up anyway. Main issue with the elevator cry is when you think you’re home free on a solo trip and then it stops and a random person gets in. Thankfully, normal human elevator etiquette is to stare at the wall and make zero eye contact until getting off to say, “have a good day.” Tears do not usually derail this social contract.

In the Lobby to Your Doorman

This is usually reserved for drunken tears. This should be our LAST RESORT. Let me repeat, do not do this regularly. You need to face this human the next day. And the next. You need to pretend you are just a normal happy person who orders from the same Chinese delivery place 3 times per week. Better to not cry in front of your doorman. However, if you MUST speak to someone about your tears and drunk dialing your parents is not an option, it’s best to cry to your doorman after 2 am. Then the doorman knows you’re just drunk and gives you a free pass (even if you’re not, I suggest pretending). ONE FREE PASS, GUYS, use it wisely.

In a Crowd

This is hit or miss. If it’s a crowd of New Yorkers, they will likely not bat an eye. New Yorkers DGAF about you, and even if they did, they probably don’t at the moment because they are too focused on why there is a crowd, and annoyed at how big it is, because they have places to be. If it’s a crowd of tourists, you are in for a bumpy and intrusive ride. Tourists always ask too many questions. During Covid, I do not recommend even being near a crowd, so let’s take a rain check on this one for now.

On the Subway

HIGHLY recommend this. First of all, pre-pandemic, subways were crowded and nobody looked at anybody. Even in the pandemic, people are reading Kindles, listening to music, trying to breathe as little as possible and not touch anything. A lot of concentration is involved. Nobody bothers you on the subway. On the off chance that a homeless man tries to comfort you (this happened to me in 2014), it will at least make for a fabulous Facebook status.

At a Bakery

Guys, this is fool-proof. You’re already there buying sweets for yourself so the assumption is that you’re depressed or PMS-ing. Why not add some tears for good measure? It almost makes more sense to be crying in a bakery than to have dry eyes. Plus, that banana pudding is just SO DELICIOUS, they may be tears of joy.

At Home

Pre-pandemic, I wouldn’t necessarily recommend this. Your roommates or significant other will ask questions. It’s too intimate. You’ll need to pretend you were watching an episode of This Is Us, even if you’re clearly watching Great British Bakeoff. But during Covid times?? We need to normalize crying at home. First and foremost, crying with a mask on is not fun. It’s messy. It’s runny. The snot combines with the saliva and then you wipe it with your mask which gets wet, and then gets cold and freezes, it’s just not a good idea. So if you don’t want to cry with a mask, that leaves one option.

Perhaps just this year, let’s cry at home. But once these vaccines start rolling out, we will be crying and mourning this lost year for many months to come. Bookmark this page and be ready to let the tears go.

Continue Reading

Big City Living

Let’s NOT Have a Parade

2 Comments

I am here to bring you the heartbreaking news that I have faced my worst disappointment of the year. All of my Thanksgiving hopes and dreams, stolen from me at the last moment. If you haven’t guessed it yet, you probably haven’t been following my blog for a full year. If you have been following me from the beginning, you know that the ultimate event of the year is THE Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade. I’ve watched it every year of my life, near or far, and the last two years, I was lucky enough to be in it.

Don’t believe I’ve written about it before? Here are some examples:

  • My sister’s parade debut: 2016
  • My Parade debut (with bro and sis): 2018
  • 2019 Breakfast Clown
  • Group of Diary of a Wimpy Kid Balloon
  • Group of Viking Clowns
  • Group of Breakfast Clowns

This year was going to be EXTRA special though, because I was supposed to be in it WITH MY SISTER. We are both Macy’s Parade FANATICS. Caps intentional. She was in the Parade’s 90th year in 2016! I was there in the grand stand watching and shouting her name, of course.

And this was going to be our year!! We were elated. A good friend of mine had a connection and got us in as float escorts. Did I mention I’d also have a friend in my group? First time ever to participate with people I knew! So many exclamation marks!! And now… nothing.

Let me rewind a bit. Of course, with Covid-19 still raging, I knew this Parade would be like no other Parade before it. We were invited to participate in early October, so we already knew there would be huge precautions including no real route or spectators, pre-recorded sections, all local participants, mandatory Covid testing and face covering… it was going to be a whole thing. But I was still excited. Can you imagine me telling my kids I was such a Parade Junkie that I marched in the one that was in the middle of a global health pandemic? I could. In fact, I did imagine it. Every day.

We’ve all had our share of disappointment this year. I had a lot of plans that were canceled. A trip to see my brother. A work trip to a military base in South Carolina. A trip to Copenhagen with my mom and brother. A trip to AUSTRALIA. I had plans to go to 15 new fitness studios in NYC and to see the NYC Ballet finally perform the Nutcracker. All of those hopes were dashed. Since March, I’ve tried to keep my expectations excruciatingly low for the year. My only hope now is to not get sick and not find out the winner of Great British Bakeoff by reading their darn Twitter spoilers.

But the Parade… I thought it was actually going to happen. Last week, we got our assignments emailed to us and I was going to be a Float Escort on the NY Life Float. I had set aside time in my work schedule to get my mandatory Covid test two days before the Parade. My 5:30 am alarm was set. And then I got the email.

  • Long explanation that says SORRY NOT SORRY.
  • Emial from the Executive Producer that was a day late, and I predict due to social media blowback.
  • F.M.L.

SORRY NO DICE. The email basically said they had to cut down participants even more, sorry. And they said our participation would be deferred to next year. However, I don’t believe that part for a few reasons I won’t go in to, but suffice it to say, that has not been the case in other scenarios. And to make matters worse, I can’t even WATCH the Parade! There are absolutely no spectators allowed. So despite the fact that I live on the Parade route, and that I was literally going to be in the Parade last week, now I will be watching it on TV alone at home and crying.

Which is a great segue for the next blog I’ll be releasing this week, one I have been meaning to write for 7 years: best places to cry in NYC. We’ll all be needing it this holiday season.

I have absolutely zero plans for Thanksgiving, but if you do, I hope you plan on celebrating safely and with members of your immediate household. Hopefully, I’ll be back next year with a more festive blog.

For now, here are some old photos through the years of Parade-watching. Check the captions for the years.

  • 1990 in the Grand Stand, My baby bro is in that bundle of blankets.
  • 2009, my bro and sis
  • 2009, my sis and me
  • 2012, calling my brother on the phone in Israel!
  • 2010 with my friend Lauren
  • 2016 with Charlotte, in line to get into the grand stand
  • 2016 in the grand stand!
  • 2018, with my sis, in the year between her parade appearance and mine!
Continue Reading

Big City Living

The Chore Chart

No Comments

I used to believe: “If you want something done well, you need to do it yourself.”

Slowly but surely, I have migrated to the camp of: “Why would I do something if I could pay someone else to do it for me?”

It’s been an evolution, but the busier I got after college, the less inclined I was to spend my “precious time” doing tasks I didn’t want to do. And truthfully, my fiancé has had a huge influence on my thinking. It’s not necessarily that he can’t do things, it’s just that he doesn’t want to. And when you are working 80+ hour work weeks, I completely understand not wanting to spend your valuable free time putting together a bookshelf or cleaning the floor. It’s all about delegating! There’s an app for that: TaskRabbit.

You might say I had my “come to Jesus” moment when we first moved apartments together. My fiancé said hands down we were getting people to pack for us. Meanwhile, I BAWKED at the $1000 price tag. But then I realized it was $500 each, and the amount of time I would spend sourcing boxes, packing etc., (and badly – I’m not a professional!) definitely made it worth hiring out. And let me tell you… I’ll NEVER go back. We lived a completely normal life until the morning of the move. There was no “we can’t have eggs, our pans are already packed,” or “what the heck box did I put my underwear in!” It was THE BEST.

But back to cleaning. We both hate cleaning. Does anyone like it? I am not a messy person, in fact, I’m pretty tidy. But tidy is not the same thing as clean. And my sweet fiancé?? I don’t think he’s ever cleaned a toilet in his life. Pretty much the first month we moved in together he sent me a piece from the New York Times about it. The Times publishes almost the exact same article every year. The gist? You’ll be in a happier relationship if someone else does the cleaning.

In the 2017 piece, an assistant professor at the Harvard Business School created a study that found, “People who spent money to buy themselves time, such as by outsourcing disliked tasks, reported greater overall life satisfaction.”

But now it’s a global pandemic and my same fiancé who couldn’t live without his cleaner is now scared to have someone come into our safe haven home. The main problem? Our house still gets dirty. In fact, it’s way worse because we are in it 24/7! The only food we eat, we make in our own kitchen. The only bathroom we use is our own. We aren’t taking vacations and sleeping elsewhere. It’s a mess. Literally.

I knew I needed to nip this in the bud as soon as we came back to NYC, so I started priming Chris for this idea of splitting chores. While in Texas I mentioned how I didn’t want to be in charge of all cleaning. Then I talked about how he wanted to split tasks. I have learned from working with children that the more buy-in and choice they think they have, the better the result. So I asked him:

  • Are there certain things you prefer to do?
  • Do you want to do the same chores every week?
  • Should we switch off?
  • What are the things we should make sure we are cleaning daily/weekly/monthly?

Then I took out my scrapbooking box from under the bed (this is NYC, a lot of stuff goes under there) and got to work. I even crowdsourced on Facebook to see if people had ideas or templates. Most templates I saw online only were for children’s chores. I only two examples of couples splitting chores, which I found semi-troubling (Thrifty Mom and Our Little Apartment).

I spent a long time figuring out the color scheme I wanted. Too long, if I’m being honest. Then I used a paper cutter to measure out the exact dimensions so it was even. I used a tiny puncher to round all of the corners. I layered paper within my chosen color scheme. I found sparkly stickers to spell out our names. Then I had to divide the tasks evenly.

Chris said he had no preference of tasks and that he’d like to switch off. I made my chart and I made our names on separate pieces of paper so I could switch them week to week. I looked on Amazon for cute, pretty, and strong magnets. I needed something that would stick through lamination, and I wanted them pretty since they were going to live on our fridge (which is visible from pretty much our entire apartment because New York).

I made a check list with mini circles that would hopefully match up with my magnets, and two columns for tasks to do, and tasks that were done. In theory, this was so that we could do the chores slowly throughout the week/month and know that at least they were getting done at some point. In reality, we have been leaving them until Sunday and then doing them all. I told you we hate chores! Procrastination is the name of the game.

Here’s how it’s going: the chores are getting done but we hate it. I feel less anxious because I’m not living in filth but I do dread Sundays. And 2.5 weeks in, Chris asked me to text our old cleaning lady and ask her to come back. She hasn’t written me back yet, but I’ll keep you posted. At least it looks cute!

  • Zoomed in so you can see the deets.
  • Zoom out so you can see the aesthetic. How’d I do?
Continue Reading

Miscellaneous

Purple Hair, Don’t Care

4 Comments

Hi Guys! So much has happened since we last spoke and there are so many things to write about. I went to another lake house, I went on an airplane during Covid times, I’m back in New York, AND I’m in quarantine in 500 square feet with my fiancé. But the most important thing that has happened: I dyed my hair purple!

This may not be so exciting to you, but it is to me. Here’s why:

  1. I’ve wanted to do this for years.
  2. It’s the only cool thing I have done for myself all year (getting engaged was pretty cool but it wasn’t my doing).
  3. There’s really no better time for it.

When I say I’ve wanted to do this for years, I’m not exaggerating. A year ago, I got serious enough about it to go on Pinterest and Instagram and find my perfect inspiration photo. It’s been in my phone and bookmarked since then. Once I knew what I wanted to do with my hair, I needed to find the perfect time and the perfect stylist to create my look. You guys know I have a whole Instagram dedicated to my hair (hair in general, but MY hair during Covid-19). It’s not like I trust any old shmo to color my crown!

Approximately 2.5 years ago, I started following Sydney Lopez on my braidstagram, and even though I don’t color hair, her creations were SO gorgeous that I semi-stalked her and liked every single photo on her feed, replying to her stories, etc. 2 years ago at Christmas, I realized she lived and worked an hour away from where Chris’s family is, so I tried to book her when I was there for Christmas. Unfortunately she told me she doesn’t usually work that week, and when she does, she’s booked solid months in advance. Makes sense, I guess – she has 125K Instagram followers.

Anyway, when I found myself back in Texas, this time for 6 months and offseason from Christmas, I figured I’d hit her up! She recently had a baby, and was constantly posting on her stories about Covid safety (she even called out her drive-through people at Whataburger), so I felt comfortable with her safety measures. Next, I just needed her to have space in her calendar. When I slid into her DM’s, she said she hadn’t taken new clients in years, but she felt like she knew me, i.e. my stalking totally paid off. I made the appointment for the weekend before I came back to New York. I figured it would give me a fresh start and the perfect autumn hair.

The morning of my appointment, I picked up my mobile order from Starbucks, chugged it during my commute, and got ready for 4+ hours in a mask. She told me when I booked the appointment that it would likely take 4-5 hours, and included “cut, blow dry and style, & tons of pics of course.” She gets me.

When I arrived, she offered me a disposable mask so my cute one wouldn’t get dyed purple, and we were off to the races. The salon was adorable. It was set up so that each stylist had sliding glass doors around their chairs. She told me that pre-Covid, they had the doors open all the time, but it was so great for the pandemic because they didn’t need to make structural changes to the salon, they just slid the doors closed. First, she redid my balayage so my hair would be super light to paint purple over. In between steps while my hair was processing, she left the room and closed the sliding glass doors so I could take mask breaks. But honestly, it wasn’t bad to wear one at all. It’s difficult when running (more on that in another post), but when you’re sitting down chatting, or playing around on your phone, it’s not a big deal.

Speaking of chatting, we chatted the entire time! One of my favorite things to talk about is how people came into their careers, since I work in career services. Her story was so unique, and she actually didn’t go to cosmetology school until she was 29 years old, very old for the industry. It was so cool to meet and talk with someone IRL who I met through the internet! I met my fiancé that way, after all.

When she was mixing colors, she said, “it looks like your inspiration pic has some pink and different tones of purple; are you ok if I blend in multiple shades?” Of course I said YES. In all caps. She’s the professional. She did my regular balayage, darkened my roots (because grays), rinsed, painted it purple, rinsed, dried, and styled, and then the photoshoot began! Check out this Reel of the process.

She gave me some great posing tips for future braid clients, and we took photos in two locations so we could get different lighting. First, inside with a ring light, then outside in a parking garage (all white) with indirect sunlight. It looked SO GOOD. She absolutely nailed my inspiration photo. In fact, I think she did even better! And of course, since you guys know my new obsession with dip powder nails, I did my nails to match in preparation for the new color.

I can’t think of a better time to have purple hair. I have no in-person meetings, the color barely shows up in Zoom lighting, and it’s not like we are planning a wedding or anything! I am absolutely loving my new hair, and I’ve been styling it in braids every day, multiple times a day, just because everything looks so much better in purple. What do you guys think??

Continue Reading

Travel

Lake Tyler Covid Getaway

1 Comment

Well guys, it’s been 6 months of quarantine/social distancing. SIX. MONTHS. HALF A YEAR. How is it possible that I feel SO TIRED from doing ABSOLUTELY NOTHING?? I know I am coming in strong with the all-caps. I promise to calm down. I wanted a great way to express my frustration with 2020. Yelling via capital letters seemed fitting.

After 5 months of sitting in the house, my fiancé and I decided we needed a weekend away. Or rather, I decided I needed a weekend away, and he said he’d come with me. I promised to do all of the work as long as he split the cost. I know there are people out in Instagram-land who are now comfortable traveling by land or by plane, gathering with friends, renting houses together, going to the beach together etc., but the more I look at the science and facts about Covid, the less comfortable I am doing any of those things, which limited the scope of my “weekend away” plans. I had three goals in mind:

  1. Change of Pace/Change of Place
  2. Alone
  3. On the water.

For the past 6 months, we have been staying at my fiancé’s family’s house. Don’t get me wrong, we are thankful. It is beyond generous that they have allowed us to stay this long. But I have not lived with kids or parent-figures in 15 years. And I have lived ALONE with my boyfriend for more than 3 years. It is not the same to have kids running around asking if I’m working (yes, it’s Monday), or if I can play (no, I’m working). There are also (cough cough) certain parts of a relationship that are difficult when there are 6 other people constantly in the house.

And as for a change of place on the water… I really miss the beach. I am a Florida girl at heart, and despite not living by the beach for a decade in New York, I ALWAYS make at least 2 trips to the beach per year. Sometimes it’s the Jersey Shore, sometimes it’s Greece and Italy. Being land-locked in a state larger than most countries has felt a bit like being in jail. I missed the water. A lot.

I went on VRBO and started looking for waterfront properties within 5 hours driving distance of our house. I set a budget of $400/night. If there was a hammock, it got extra points. I whittled my list to 5 properties and sent it to Chris to pick. (This a strategic thing I always do, so that if the property ends up being bad I can blame him. But if it’s great then of course it’s because I put the list together!) On the list, I had a few lake-front properties in Texas and Louisiana, and one in Galveston on the Gulf of Mexico. We went with a place in Whitehouse, Texas, on Lake Tyler, which was only 2 hours from our home. It was $199/night and only slept 2 people – perfect! Our plans were almost ruined when the dueling hurricanes in the Gulf threatened to hit our place, and I felt very lucky that Chris picked a property in Texas, not Louisiana. Go Chris!

We drove to the house after work on Thursday, and thankfully Chris drove so I could snack. Sure, the drive was only 2 hours, but I packed enough road trip snacks for an approximately 24-hour drive. We hit a slight roadblock when Google Maps led us to a road where there was no house with the number on it. Thankfully, the property owner picked up his phone right away and explained there were TWO roads with the same name. After a 15-minute detour, we got the right place and unpacked our things.

If you are looking for a blog about all of the things we did on our vacation weekend, you won’t find one, because we did NOTHING and it was GLORIOUS. Most of the time was spent sitting outside on the covered deck. Eating meals. Reading books. Listening to music. Reading more. Listening to an audio book. Watching Love Island. Eating some more and lounging around. It was fabulous.

  • Every morning.
  • Coffee and fresh air, nothing like it.
  • But are we cute? DUH.
  • Thumbs up for lazy days.
  • You can find me with my Kindle and Pina Colada.

I am a HUGE Fitbit fan, and despite working from home, I have been trying to keep up with my 10,000/day step goal since social distancing began. The last day I had not met my 10K goal was April 6th. The first day at the lake I got 3.9K steps. And I was proud of that.

The second full day we were there, we did a few activities. We rented paddle boards from the owner of the house, I floated around in blow-up floats I bought from Amazon for the weekend while we listened to country music on our Sonos speaker, and then we played Corn Hole on the owner’s lawn. There were so many games in the house including mega-Jenga, Horseshoes, Poker, and cards. We played a few rounds of Phase 10 in between episodes of Love Island.

Not to be corny, but it felt like we were on our own love island! The house itself was AMAZING. We didn’t know at the time of booking, but it was set back behind the owner’s house, completely separate from his home, and surrounded on all four sides by water. It was fully renovated with a dishwasher and bathroom and water views from every room. Also, there was a covered and uncovered deck. The décor was adorable, with “Lake Life” and “Lake House” accents everywhere. Also, it was tricked out! They had a state-of-the-art dishwasher/fridge/ice machine/blender/convection stovetop, fully stocker Keurig, etc. They even had a wine cooler. There was an Apple TV (we brought our own, because duh), and a Bluetooth speaker we could bring onto the deck (we also brought our own because duh), and I wish I could have stayed there a whole week.

The only issue with Covid “vacationing” is the food. We had to BYO everything and we weren’t sure about the availability of delivery. Especially in Texas, we wanted to limit our time in grocery stores/anywhere in the sticks where people are less likely to wear masks. There were many trips back and forth from the car; 3 meals a day for two people is a lot of groceries! Not to mention a case of beer and pina colada mix. To make cooking easier than it is at home, I made Chris sit down and meal-plan with me before we left. We had options for each meal. Breakfast: eggs/cinnamon rolls/sausage. Lunch: Sandwiches/grilled cheese/tacos. Dinner: Burgers/Frozen Pizza/Chicken Parm. Cooking was easier with only 2 people’s dishes and a dishwasher. For some reason it felt WAY simpler than cooking at home.

  • Breakfast
  • More Breakfast
  • More Lunch
  • Dinner
  • More Dinner
Covid Vacation Home Cooking

The owner was available for any questions all the time, and we saw him a few times when he came down to take his boat out (not included in the house LOL), but he always texted first to warn us. Also, he gave us a better deal on the paddleboards than he advertised on his listing, and provided life jackets, which was nice of him. He was kind enough to mention to me that we just missed the Trump Boat Parade the weekend before. (Not the infamous one from last weekend. See pics below, there were still plenty of boats left with flags on them.). Chris lost his Goodr sunglasses in the lake and I left my flip flops on the grass (guess I had too many ciders playing corn hole) but besides those two losses, we had only wins and successes. My best friend had been telling me for months how important it was for mental health to get away and have a change of pace; I should have listened to her earlier.

We booked one more weekend trip for this upcoming weekend, our LAST weekend in Texas! This time, we got a BIG house, lakefront again, and we’re bringing the whole family as a last hoorah! I can’t wait to share more with you about it. And if you’re ever in the Lake Tyler area in Texas, I’ll send you the VRBO listing, I can’t recommend it enough!

Continue Reading

Miscellaneous

PeppiGel Manicures, My New Home Hobby

1 Comment

Month 6 of quarantine coming in hot! What types of activities have you all been up to? I am slowly realizing that all of the things I used to do for fun – going out to restaurants, shows, concerts, movies, bars, hanging with friends – I can’t do any more. That leaves me with quite a bit of extra time in the house. This has led me to a huge expansion of what I’m calling Home Hobbies. You guessed it – hobbies I can do without leaving the front door of my house or donning a mask.

I started my Home Hobby Quest by ordering a mannequin head and attempting more and more intricate braids. Recently, I have semi-mastered a 7-strand ribbon braid on Quarantina.

  • 7-strand braid!
  • Curved braid practice.
  • Quarantina looking snazzy.

Then, I ordered a tripod and learned to edit videos so I could make braid tutorials. I even made a Youtube Channel! More recently, I downloaded the SignSchool App to start re-learning American Sign Language. But my new ultimate obsession/addiction/money-sucking, all-thought-consuming hobby has been learning to do my own gel dip manicures at home. Enter PEPPIGEL.

PeppiGel is an at-home dip powder system that doesn’t use UV lamps and doesn’t contain any of the 9 harshest chemicals found in beauty products. But besides that? It’s fun as heck and more addicting than alcohol. Not that I haven’t had a pina colada on the side once or twice while dipping. I learned about Peppi from a friend as I was scrolling Instagram stories (another Home Hobby), and saw her AMAZING nails. Of course I jumped on her, as any good internet-policer/Karen does, and asked HOW she went to salon in the middle of NYC in a pandemic. To which she said, “I did them myself!” Me: “WHAT?? HOW??”

  • My Starter Kit (plus 5 other colors I ordered)
  • My very first Peppicure!
  • Nail decals I haven’t used yet.

The basic premise is, you use their 3 liquids in a specific order, and together with the many different colors of powder, it creates a salon-quality manicure that lasts up to 3 weeks. Or so people say. I usually get so excited to use new colors/bored of my old colors/just bored in the house that I have been changing them every 10 days or so.

Now, when I show my nails in my Instagram story, or on my various aforementioned braid tutorials, people are in awe. The awe is usually followed by, “but is it hard?” The answer is… sorta. There is a steep learning curve. In my first attempt, the gel was SUPER thick and the edges were jagged. My second one, I still struggled with the straight cuticle line. But I’m learning new techniques all the time! I attempted tie dye a few weeks ago, and angle dipping last week.

And no worries, there are tens of thousands of ladies in the Peppi Cult to help you out! Think I’m exaggerating? Their private Tips & Tricks FB group has more than 43 thousand members. People post photos of their latest manis, ask for photos of new colors they’re considering buying, post funny nails memes, or just ask questions like, “My brush for liquid #3 is all stiff, what did I do wrong?” Within 5 minutes, there are 20+ replies and tips from other group members.

Me after literally 3 weeks in the group.

Still not sure if it’s a cult or a pyramid scheme? Kind of both. In fact, I have a code to give you if you want $15 off your starter kit! It gives me a discount, too. But beware, it’s incredibly addicting. Within a month of ordering my kit, I now follow them on Instagram, I subscribe to multiple nail artist Youtube Channels for tutorials, and I’m considering getting Pinterest. Considering. And keep in mind, I’ve only been doing this since July 22nd! It escalates quickly.

It’s less of a pyramid scheme, and more like an ongoing Tupperware Party for fancy nails. And speaking of parties, they have one every single Tuesday!! It’s not like I’m doing anything else! On Peppi’s official FB page (liked by 108,174 people and followed by 114,084), they host a Tutorial Party weekly at 8:30 pm ET, where they teach different techniques and tips. There is a whole secret lexicon like the “apex method” and “use an orange stick around the cuticle” and “tap tap versus scrub ombre.” Oh, and they do giveaways! Sometimes it’s based on trivia and sometimes it’s random if they reach a certain amount of people watching. And the entire time, comments STREAM in with people buying the sale color of the night… and 7 other colors. Some of these women have swatches of more than 100 colors and rolling carrying cases! I created a Bingo Card/Drinking Game for FB Lives. Anyone want to watch and play with us??

Personally, I don’t have a carrying case yet, and I’m only at 12 colors (3 more on the way!), but I do have a Google sheet with color swatches in one cell, thanks to my sister, and links to the color in the next column. The colors all have super fun names, and they have quickly become a second language. I did my nails for a weekend getaway to a lake in blue (Pontoon Party and Just Say Yes). I am already planning a new manicure for my purple hair when I color it in September (Summertime Sadness and Disco Party). And I’m considering which autumn colors I should get that would go well with pumpkin picking (Chianti or Scorpion Venom?). And what about Halloween? Maybe Candy Corn nails (Onyx, Mighty Mango and Boombox Baby?). Or Florida Football (Manowar and Mighty Mango?) By the way, I just wrote that whole paragraph from memory. I didn’t check the website once.

  • Peppi #1, a little thick!
  • Peppi 2, attempt (fail) at angle dipping
  • Peppi 3 prep… tie dye!
  • Tie Dye success! Still working on cuticle lines.
  • Peppi 4 for the lake, gorgeous angle dip AND cuticle lines!
  • Nails at the lake.

Clearly, I have a problem. But it’s such a pretty one! I never painted my nails before because they chipped so often and frustrated me. Also because I have no left hand dexterity and got it all over my hands. But I am absolutely loving this new hobby of mine. And if I ever stop buying colors, I may even save money from not going to a salon ever again! Some women in the group do their own nails for their weddings. Want to join me on the cult journey? Check out the website, and don’t forget… USE MY CODE to help fuel my addiction!

Continue Reading

Big City Living

I Miss New York

2 Comments

You always hear “I <3 New York” from tourists and residents, but you rarely hear “I Miss New York.” In fact, in the past few weeks, New York has been getting a bad rap. There are articles popping up, even in the New York Times, about how “New York is Over.” And then there are die-hard New Yorkers who are coming for them. It’s become incredibly factious.

And honestly, the die-harders would probably say I have no right to speak on the issue, since I “fled” the city on March 14th. I’ve crossed the 5-month mark. This is by FAR the longest I’ve been away from my home city since I got there. Not that it was exactly my choice.

Speaking of my home, last week was New Yorkiversary! August 12th, 2010. A decade in New York – minus 5 months. And it feels so wrong not to be there for my anniversary, not to be able to celebrate with my friends or with my sister who lives 13 blocks from me (now 1,500 miles away).

Anyway, being away from New York, I feel like it gives me so much more of a right to stand up for it. I can talk about all of the things I miss. The things that make New York unique. Now, from an outsider’s perspective. Also, I still pay more than $3,000/month for a 500 square-foot, one-bedroom apartment, so I feel like I have a right. One does not pay that kind of rent for an uninhabited apartment unless one really loves New York.

Here are some of the things I miss:

  • Singing like no one’s listening… because they’re not. Sometimes I like to sing to the music in my ear pods. In a subway station, walking down the street, wherever. Sometimes alcohol is involved, sometimes I’m just feeling the song. And nobody looks at you twice because you can be guaranteed that you are not the weirdest thing they saw that day.
  • Wearing anything you want. Again, there are weirder outfits than yours. Crocs and PJ pants to the bodega for emergency Sunday morning Gatorade? Bra not mandatory. Speaking of…
  • Bodegas. I don’t miss the cats (IYKYK), but I miss that there is always a corner store open with anything you might need. Advil, sausage, egg and cheese sandwich, foil. Pretty much anything. Also, you can walk there!
  • Walking. As you read a few weeks ago, we went to Top Golf for a social distanced date night. And as we both ordered drinks, we looked at each other and realize, “EW one of us has to drive??? Lame.” In the five years of our relationship, we never have had to deal with that. Even on vacations, we had Ubers or public transportation.
  • Doormen. Not all people have them, but it’s much more normalized in New York. I miss drunkenly asking my doormen how their day was when I get home at 1 am. I miss the feeling of always having someone to smile at when I get home (I know some people would hate this – I’m friendly, I can’t help it). I miss someone to empathize with about the weather. I wonder if they miss me?
  • Running into friends in Central Park. When the whole city centers around the same park, it’s easier to accidentally find people there.
  • Flexible/Multiuse Space. Hear me out. New Yorkers are THE BEST at using the space they have. Whether it means building custom bookshelves that literally go to the ceiling, or having a table that functions as a desk, a dining table AND a library, there is no wasted space. I cannot imagine owning an ottoman that is not a comfortable chair, and also opens for storage. Or a TV that is not mounted on the wall. In Texas we a half-full walk-in closet in our room. In New York, it would be an office. Or a nursery. I think this makes New Yorkers incredibly talented and creative designers/innovators.
  • Sidewalk Waterers. Is anyone in NYC keeping them accountable?? If a sidewalk gets watered and it isn’t on my Instagram story, does it even get clean???
  • Food. I swear, guys, I didn’t realize the quality of food we have in New York. Don’t @ me, of course I knew about the Michelin star restaurants. I’m talking about fast-casual. The things we order from Seamless. Every restaurant we order in from in New York is AMAZING. If it isn’t, it closes. It’s crazy the sh*t food they get away with here in Texas. I had a sushi roll the other day… let’s just say I wish I hadn’t.

There are a lot of other things I miss about New York, but some of those things aren’t happening now anyway because of the pandemic. Those things include: sports, Broadway, boozy party brunches, the people in general, and the subway entertainment (I’ve been gone too long if I miss them). But I’ve got big news, we officially booked our tickets to come back to New York! One month and counting. It feels so wrong to be missing my 10th 9/11, but I will be thinking about my city and the struggles it will continue to get through as we remain New York Tough.

It will certainly be a challenge to work from home together with my new-fiancé in our tiny-home, but I can’t wait to get back to my city. I left a piece of my heart there, and despite what the internet-trolls say, I know it’s still there! Pandemic notwithstanding.

Continue Reading

Long Legs and other Personal Problems

Project Net Zero

3 Comments

Money is on a lot of our minds nowadays. Some people are worried how to pay bills this month because the government discontinued unemployment checks. Others of us are on Amazon every day buying our happiness to our doorstop. Either way, one thing is for sure: all of our spending habits have changed this year.

I am incredibly lucky to still have a job, and despite losing all of the income I was bringing in by teaching at the gym and braiding hair, I am still saving more than ever because I can barely spend any money. I’m cooking meals at home, having drinks at home, making coffee at home, not traveling anywhere… basically everything I spent money on BC (Before Covid), I can’t do anymore!

This change in spending habits came at a very interesting time, right after I got engaged. You may remember that my now-fiancé was the first person to whoop my finances into shape in 2017. He works in finance and needed to give me a crash course on how to be fiscally responsible. Now that we are talking about combining our lives and finances FOREVER, we talk about money a lot!

Back in 2017, he was horrified that I had credit card debt (not to mention my sky-high pile of student loans from law school), and he quickly taught me the importance of a retirement account. Also, I didn’t understand the concept of a savings account. I mean I did, but I didn’t have any money to put in said account.

I posted a blog in April 2017 to talk about my newfound addiction to mint.com. I finally gave in to my dad and boyfriend’s pleas to start budgeting and tracking money, and I became obsessed. At that time, I was checking my account every day. Now, it’s a little bit less, but it’s still fun to check! There’s something about watching the graphs populate that makes it fun to save. There is some science behind this; it’s all about the gamification. There are studies proving that this can work, and there are many apps that have been created specifically with this in mind. I love to look at the Trends tab with performance graphs and pie charts, and I love receiving the emails congratulating me about my increased credit score. The whole thing is fun. And since there’s nothing left in 2020 that’s fun, I was checking my mint the other day when I realized something… I’M ALMOST AT NET ZERO. That’s right, my net worth is approaching equilibrium. I told my fiancé and he said that when I get to net zero, we can throw an “Emily is Worth Nothing Party.”

Amazing News: I think I’ll get to Net Zero in a month or two.

Bad News: I was SO PSYCHED about the prospect of a party I didn’t realize that Covid would still be going on, so it was likely to be a party where I wear a party hat in the house and drink alone. Meh.

Anyway, I know you want to know how I got here. When I started using mint in September 2016, I had a net worth of $-107,000. At my lowest in November 2016, my net worth was $-111,612. Talk about daunting. I didn’t understand how I would ever dig myself out of 100K of debt by sticking to a $20/month coffee budget. You may recall my wake-up call was when my dad asked if I needed a payment plan to pay for my $120 state taxes. I was determined to try and get out of debt. Some of these tips and tricks you may be able to use, and some, I realize may not be applicable.

  1. Track your spending. This is pretty straightforward. Over time, tracking spending does change spending habits. For me, when I realized my $100 bar tab would show up at the end of the month on my mint, I thought twice before ordering another round.
  2. Get a roommate. I know, this seems dumb but BY FAR the most expensive thing each month in New York is rent. It’s astronomical. I never had a crazy expensive apartment, but I saved $500/month when I moved in with my boyfriend (now fiancé). The other day I added up how much I’ve saved on rent since we moved in together: $21,000 (42 months x $500). That’s a lot of moolah. Maybe you can’t move in with a boyfriend, but seriously consider how much of your paycheck you’re spending on rent before you sign a lease.
  3. Credit Card Churning, baby! This is a complicated concept for some, but if you’re spending money anyway, spend it in a way that earns you money back! (Spend more and save more! HA) I wrote a whole blog on it before, so I won’t reiterate, but I have probably saved $10K-$15K in travel in the past 4 years by solely using points.
  4. Set Goals. You guys know I’d rather set a goal than “make a resolution,” but SMART goals work! I had 4 financial goals in 2019, and by putting pen to paper and looking at them periodically, it kept me honest and committed. I surpassed them all! Make sure they are attainable, so you aren’t dejected.
  5. If you have student loans, try to understand repayment options and interest rates. Again, I wrote an entire blog series on my student loans, so I won’t say it again. But it’s important to know the interest rates of your loans so you can pay off the high interest ones first. Maybe combine it with #3 and get a credit card to pay off some of them.
  6. Take advantage of any retirement contribution from work. I am super guilty of NOT doing this. When my fiancé found out my work had a matching program that I was not taking advantage of, he literally texted me the next day at work to ask if I had signed up yet. And that means a lot because he does NOT text me during the day (we’ve worked on his texting; it’s gotten better since 2017). If your employer is matching any percentage of your contribution, take advantage. That is literally FREE money.
  7. Advocate for yourself at work. I’m talking about raises. Have you been at the same job for years without pay increases? You are your own best advocate. You need to figure out how to get compensated for your work. Is this easy? Hell no! It’s super hard. I coach people every day on how to ask for raises, and it’s still not easy for me to do! If you are very lost on where to start, I recently listened to a podcast with Ramit Sethi, author of I Will Teach You To Be Rich, where he laid out a specific plan on how to speak to a supervisor about a raise.

I did all of the things I listed above, and more. Between lack of travel this year and decreased all-around spending, I am almost at Net Zero! Do I still have student loans? You betcha. Almost $100K still. But my retirement is growing, I have a 401K, a Roth IRA, a savings account, the whole deal. And more than the numbers, I feel like I’m in control of my finances for the first time in my life. Do any of you guys set financial goals? What’s the hardest part about it? Have you had any big achievements? What do you do to celebrate?

Continue Reading

Miscellaneous

Top Golf Social Distance Date

2 Comments

I asked you guys for social distance date ideas 2.5 months ago and we finally went on one! Needless to say, my Bullet Journal Goal of one out-of-house date night/month has not been being achieved. Another Covid casualty. We went to Top Golf and had a blast! Hopefully the fun we had will last me another 2.5 months. It met all of our criteria for a date: relatively close-by, open air, masks mandatory, fun, out of the house.

By the way, when I asked for your advice for date ideas, NONE OF YOU COMMENTED. What’s up with that??? Thankfully, I asked my Instagram followers on my private Instagram a week later, and I got a few great ideas. We didn’t do any of these (yet), but I wanted to post them here in case you are looking for things to do. Ya know, since you won’t find any in the comments of my last post.

  • Puzzle night
  • Top chef cook off, quarantine style, use only what’s in the kitchen
  • Hiking
  • Slip and slide in the backyard. Along with the kiddie pool, add White Claws for a water park day
  • Bake macarons
  • DIY Paint and Sip (order canvases on Amazon)
  • Drive-In movie theater
  • Bonfires & Boggle

Anyway, we haven’t done those things yet, but we are now golf pros!! JK, we are both AWFUL. We failed in glorious fashion but we didn’t care.

Since we are currently residing in a Covid hot spot, we wanted to go on a date at an off time. We decided on a weeknight at 9 pm. We made a lane reservation earlier in the day, and I even put on makeup for the occasion! I think the only things that mattered were eyebrows and eyelashes because masks, but it still felt good to have a reason to put on a bra. A real one. That I don’t pull over my head (what!?)

Top Golf required masks in all inside areas, which meant you needed one to check in (contactless) and to walk through the lobby to your outside lane. Every person working there was wearing a mask at all times, over mouth AND nose. Yes, I need to specify that here in Texas. I was impressed. The inside bar was closed, and the bathroom doors were propped open and facilities were being obsessively cleaned. Even the clubs were being sanitized between each lane turnover.

The actual golf lane did not require masks, and between each lane they had floor to ceiling clear tarps, sort of like shower curtain liners. It felt very safe. On the actual greens there were no tarps between, and most people were not wearing masks once in their lanes, so I just staggered my putts when someone was on the green in the lane next to ours. In bowling, that’s common courtesy so I didn’t mind. By the way, I’m MUCH better at bowling.

We both ordered drinks and had them at the table – masks off only when we were behind our tarp! It was really nice to have a drink I didn’t make myself. Even if it cost 5x more than the ones I make at home. It was the first time I had a drink outside the house since March 13th! We decided not to get food, because we were still iffy about the kitchen etc., but it was fabulous to socialize, even to say “thank you” to a waiter (masked, of course).

We took a few photos of each other as well as videos, where I was usually swinging and not even making contact with the ball. Oops. We tried a few selfies. There’s no handing your phone to strangers nowadays, so it’s a good thing I am VERY well-practiced at selfie-taking. I attempted to teach Chris how to smize. He thought it meant opening your eyes as wide as they go. It made for some pretty funny pics.

  • Chris attempting a “smize,” me laughing at him.
  • Both of us “smizing”
  • A cute pic! (Notice our lane neighbor)

Are you wondering when I’m going to tell you our scores? NEVER! We were so bad that at one point we accidentally golfed for each other, and let me tell you, it did not matter. We will not be competing against Tiger any time soon. It was a fabulous date night for my sanity and mental health, not so much for my confidence. If you have a Top Golf near you, they outline their safety precautions for each location online. Feel free to call ahead to ask questions, as well. I recommend it!

Check out that ring!
Continue Reading

Long Legs and other Personal Problems

Pity Party

No Comments

It’s ok to not be ok. I hereby welcome you to my Pity Party.

I saw a tweet the other day that said “physically i am two days away from july, emotionally i am still processing February.” This could not be any more real. Like… what the F*&K happened to 2020?? I looked at the calendar the other day and I was like wow… back in January, WHO WOULD HAVE THUNK?!

And here’s the thing, there are a lot of terrible things going on in the world. There is a police brutality crisis, mass incarceration, unemployment, world hunger, and Russian dictators putting bounties on American soldiers. Not to mention 503K deaths worldwide from Covid, and more every day.

But you know what else is going on? NOTHING. At least in my life. And to be completely honest, I have good days and bad days. Last weekend? A lot of bad days. But I had ice cream, which made it a little bit better.

I’m in mourning for the year I thought I was going to have. I had really high hopes! I had goals to visit three new countries. Remember traveling? Another goal: to go to 100 bootcamp classes. Ya know, at the gym. Remember those? And another goal: To book hair for 2 weddings.  Remember weddings? Where people attended IRL and got their hair done?

Speaking of weddings, how about mine?

This is usually around the point where I start to unravel. Not to be overly dramatic, but my entire plan for my life has come undone at this point. And yes, I know it’s only been 4 months of quarantine (so far), but the reality is, we have a LONG road ahead of us. No vaccine on the horizon, no idea when it will be released. When it is, will it be safe? Will it be unfathomably expensive? Will it be widely available? Should it be? We won’t know the long-term side effects; we won’t really know what side effects there are at all. Will you even feel comfortable taking it? And how long until we do feel comfortable? What happens in the meantime?

Back to my life plan – it’s out the window at this point. I feel like Rachel from Friends when she turns 30. (That whole clip is worth watching, by the way.)

In Rachel’s words, “I realized it was stupid to get upset about not having a husband and kids, all I really needed was a plan!” Well we all know what they said about the best laid plans. If you guys don’t watch the clip, the gist is that she wants three kids, starting to have the first one at 35 so she counts backward from there and… spoiler alert, she is already too old for her own plan.

I’m not going to say I live by the Rachel Green’s plan, but the annoying part about this whole pandemic is that a LOT of things have been postponed. Weddings can be pushed off, travel can be rescheduled, engagement parties, brunches, celebrations of all kinds. But you know what Rachel had right? Time marches on and fertility still has an expiration date. Wtf!

Now, this is not a blog about having a baby, and I’m not having one right now anyway, but I’d like to have time before I do. Time to travel without kids. Time to enjoy my engagement. Time to celebrate it. Time to plan a wedding and actually visit venues, to have the opportunity see them with my own eyes. Time to enjoy Girls Nights Out.

When we got engaged, for the three glorious weeks post-engagement and pre-pandemic, people asked if we had a wedding date. (Why? I have no idea. Don’t do that, guys.) Anyway, when I said we didn’t, invariably they said, “That’s great! That’s fine! Enjoy your engagement! It’s the best time.”

Is this “enjoying our engagement?” Is it “the best time?” Living in a house that is not our own, halfway across the country, without the ability to go out on dates, have an engagement party, show off my ring, see my parents? I can’t even get my nails done to show my ring off on Instagram!

So yeah, I’m not ok. Not today, at least. I spent the last three days watching TV and trying to forget real life. It didn’t really work but the ice cream was good. I realize that things could be worse. We are lucky to be employed, safe, healthy, etc. But sometimes I need to throw myself a pity party. Y’all are invited to the next one. It’ll be on Zoom. BYO ice cream.

Continue Reading