Today I am continuing my series of “frequently asked questions.” My personal FAQ section is right here in this blog so I’m dedicating today’s blog to another one of the questions people ask me most frequently, “should I microblade my eyebrows?” If you missed the first in this series, “should I get laser hair removal?” go check that out now.
I am not going to make you read through this whole post before finding out who I went to for my amazing brows. Her name is Purdie Baumann @purdiebrows and she is the absolute GOAT. Not only is she the best at her craft, she’s also an ex-Rockette. As in, Radio City. How cool is that??
Purdie and Me!
I know you have a million questions, and I’m constantly recommending her, so let’s get down to the obvious question first:
“Should I get my eyebrows microbladed?”
Answer: Yes. Moving on.I’m kidding, of course I will tell you more. I have a long-standing hatred of my eyebrows. When I was VERY young, like 11 years old, I told my mom that I hated my eyebrows more than anything else on my body. I remember her saying that was dumb, because you could easily wax and shape them, and for the next 3.5 years I had an eyebrow sponsor: my mom. My mom had electrolysis as a teenager, so she understood the concept of unwanted hair and she was happy to pay this small amount to help me like my face more. Once I made my own babysitting money, I started paying for my own eyebrow waxes.There was a terrible moment around age 15 when I didn’t want to pay for the biweekly appointments and I had a genius idea to use the self-waxing strips from Walgreens instead. (Narrator: it was not genius). Long story short, I put one of them at the wrong angle and took off the tail end of one of my eyebrows. Ok, truth be told it was far more than the tail end. I was completely missing an eyebrow. My friends called me Mr. Clean. I had to wear eyebrow pencil for 2 months. As you may remember from previous blogs, I sweat a lot, so living in South Florida, the liner would start to drip. Mortifying. Before you ask, no, I do not have any throwback photos of this time. Thank God it was before smart phones and digital cameras.Fast forward to my 20’s in New York. Thank God waxing is extremely cheap. I always say there are 4 cheap things you can get in New York City: manicures, hotdogs, dollar slices, and eyebrow waxing/threading.This brings me to my next eyebrow discovery in approximately 2012: threading. I LOVED threading. I didn’t care as much anymore about the amount of eyebrow hair I had, but the shape. I really wanted a natural arch, but I didn’t have one. Threading could give me a more natural look, and it was less painful than waxing. Also, it was CHEAP! Like $7.The main problem with threading was that it was all about taking hair away to create a shape. Unfortunately, they were not able to add hair to make it look how I wanted. As I mentioned before, I didn’t have an arch and I wanted one! So I started to think about microblading. A few years later I finally took the plunge and I am SO happy I did!
“Does microblading hurt?”
No. Well, it didn’t hurt for me, but that’s because Purdie put a numbing gel on. If anything, it felt like little scratches on my face. The main uncomfortable part was a few days later when it was scabbed and kind of itchy, but I knew I was not supposed to scratch it. I was given a super moisturizing gel, kind of like Vaseline, to put on twice a day. This minimized the itching, and contrary to the warning I received from a friend who had it done somewhere else, it did not make my face look like a glazed donut! I should warn you, my same friend said it hurt a LOT when she got hers done. Maybe her person didn’t use a numbing cream. Make sure you ask about this in a consultation and read reviews!
“Will it look fake?”
This is a great question and the best answer I have is: it depends. Not if you go to Purdie! There are a few different kinds of microblading. Some are more of a shading (like if you were to fill in/color in your eyebrows), and personally I find those to look fake. It’s more of a solid tattoo. There is also the single brush stroke method, which is what I did, and I think it looks extremely natural. I actually get compliments on my brows all the time and people think they are natural! Be very careful to go to an artist whose work you like. The best way to know what your eyebrows will look like, is to look at previous work. This leads me to the next most popular question…It looked way intense after session #1 but it faded and looked more and more natural over time.
“How do I find the right person?”
Instagram. I know that sounds crazy but as with any type of art (tattoos, hair color, painting, sculpture), you want to see the work before you commit to buying. This is especially true when the “art” you are buying is going to live on your face forever! I highly recommend looking at a person’s portfolio before booking an appointment. The easiest way to see this is on Instagram. Look at hundreds of before and afters. Find people with similar skin coloring and brow shape to you to see what the end result can be.Once you have the person you trust to do amazing work, the rest is easy because you can defer to their opinion. For example, when I went in, Purdie showed me a range of colors and asked what I wanted. I thought I wanted a very dark brown. She said she thought a medium and ash light color would look more natural. I told her that from the photos I saw, I trust her expertise and sure enough, she was right. The color does fade over time, so in my touch-up, we went a bit darker. I am so thrilled with how they came out and I know if I had gone with my original color choice, they would have been too dark for my coloring and would have looked fake, or like I was wearing makeup all the time. I love how my brows now almost look like I’m wearing natural brow makeup, but don’t look like I am wearing brow makeup and nothing else, if I have a fresh face.
“How much does it cost?”
Again, this depends. Every artist will create their own pricing structure, and it depends both on availability, demand, and market. New York is far more expensive than most places, but you can also find the best people! Personally, I paid $600 for a first appointment, and $200 for the touchup. I also tipped (of course). This was more than a year ago, so she may have adjusted her pricing. I know in New York, artists generally begin at $800-$1000. I went to Purdie’s studio in Jersey City, NJ and it was slightly cheaper, and honestly I would have gone to a much further state to get her skill level! #worthitWarning. There are Groupons out there. I mentioned raving about a Groupon for laser hair removal, for this, I’d warn against it. You want someone to take their time, you want them to be so good that they have a waiting list. If you are going to use a Groupon, PLEASE make sure you know someone personally who has had their brows done by that artist/salon! Remember this is permanent and on your face! Not the time to use a discount code.
“Don’t you have to get touch-ups all the time?”
This is a tough question for me to answer because it’s only been one year since I had my first appointment! Usually, you have an initial appointment and then a touch-up 2 months later. I had my first appointment in early October 2021, and my touch-up in early December 2021. I can tell that the ink has faded a bit when I look closely at my face, but you wouldn’t notice unless you looked with a magnifying mirror, or very very close-up. I prefer how they look now, extremely natural, although I may want a touch-up
at some point in the future.I could not be happier with my decision! One note of warning, be careful not to get “trendy” eyebrows. Remember they will be there forever! If you love the SUPER bushy look of eyebrows right now, get normal ones microbladed and just fill them in with pencil temporarily. You’ll thank me in 2 years when the trends change again!Look how spotty they were before!These photos are all after session #1. We did a few more fill-in brush strokes on the touch up 2 months later.At this point I barely remember my eyebrows the way they were before. What a drastic improvement!The side by side is mind-blowing. Look at that arch!
You know how websites have “frequently asked questions?” I feel like we should each have a section like that for us as people. For me, my FAQ section is right here in this blog so I’m dedicating today’s blog to one of the questions people ask me most frequently, right after “should I quit my job as a lawyer” (yes).
“What do you think about laser hair removal? Is it worth it? Does it work?”
Answers: Love it. Yes. Depends.
Should I go on or should I just wrap it up there? Ok fine, I’ll elaborate.
I would say the best investment of money I’ve ever made was in laser hair removal. The amount of time and money saved more than makes up for the cost.
But first, a little background. And yes, this blog should carry a TMI warning. The areas I have now lasered are underarm, Brazilian (yes, THAT. Including butt), and lower leg. And I would do more in a heartbeat.
I have been getting laser hair removal for about 10 years. I haven’t been going constantly, but I first got it ten years ago on my underarms. At the time, I was teaching fitness classes and I was in a tank top constantly and didn’t want to shave daily. My Brazilian journey also began because of fitness. It all started with an STD scare. My gynecologist was like, “um, that’s not a disease that’s an ingrown hair and you shouldn’t be on a spin bike for at least 7 days.” To which I said, “um, I have to teach tonight and also tomorrow.” She recommended I start to get waxes so the hair follicle wouldn’t get as irritated/bacteria, science science blahblah. Anyway, she said I had three options: continue to be uncomfortable, wax, or laser. So I chose wax because I was broke and dumb. Fast-forward hundreds of dollars and about 5 years, and I was like, “huh… I probably should have taken the plunge and gotten rid of this permanently.” So I did.
The way I describe it: why would you continue to rent, when you could buy?
Unless you really foresee a future where you miss and pine for your underarm hair, I don’t know why you wouldn’t get rid of it forever. So, for the question of what I think about laser, the answer is “DO IT. YESTERDAY.” Don’t spend one more dollar on waxing, it’s a waste of time and money.
I should warn you, not all lasers and salons are created equal. That one I went to a decade ago? Garbage. My underarm hair grew back almost completely. There definitely can be regrowth over time, and it is a known fact that you will need touch-ups. But the first place I went to I barely had any results. I learned my lesson, though, and started reading reviews.
This leads to my next FAQ “is it worth it?” Usually when people ask this they are talking about money. I won’t lie, it’s not cheap. But if you divide it over time, it’s definitely a good investment. That’s how I view it: an investment in both time and money. Also, less effort and planning! With shaving, you always have to make sure you shave in case you end up in a tank top, or at a pool or beach etc. With waxing you have to time them out because your hair needs to be a certain length before waxing. With laser, you actually shave before an appointment, so there’s no planning at all, and then once the hair is gone, it’s gone forever! You can attend all of the impromptu pool bashes you want! The ONLY thing to note: you are not supposed to have sun exposure before or after, so get lasered in the winter to prepare for your summer fun.
How much money are we really talking? It depends. A lot of places charge by the size of the area. Large areas will be more (like legs) and small areas will be less (like upper lip).
The first salon I went to had a deal on Groupon for “unlimited sessions for a year,” but the reality is, you only go every 6-8 weeks max. So that really means 6-8 sessions within that “unlimited” year. Plus, as I said, that first salon was trash. The place I go to now, sells either single sessions or packs of six sessions at a discount for a specific area. It’s far cheaper to buy a package, and they have specials all the time on top of the bundle discounts. ALSO: GROUPON. Yes, you heard me right, I used Groupon again even after my first travesty experience. The place I love now has a sticker price of 6 sessions on small area for $954, medium $1596, and large $3500. But with the specials they are always running, it’s more like $300, $450 and $600. Plus… GROUPON! On Groupon right now it is $61.50 for six small, $135 for six medium, or $208 for six large. That is a STEAL.
As with the salons, not all Groupons are created equal. And I’ll say it again… READ THE REVIEWS. The reviews will tell you everything. The place I go to now has 1,459 ratings and it is rated 4.9/5 stars. I’m telling you, this place is bomb.
Now to my final FAQ: does it work? Well yes, duh. I wouldn’t be writing this whole saga of a blog post if it didn’t. But again, not all results are equal. First of all, they say that the more contrast there is between the skin color and the hair color, the better the results. So lighter skin and darker hair make for better results. Also, not all areas work the same. My underarms are PESKY. I have had many, many sessions on them and I still have residual hair. But the hair that is left is way lighter and not visible from a distance at all, definitely not in a dark gym studio. I shave maybeee once a week now instead of every day. But the results on my legs?? COMPLETELY GONE. In six sessions. And that was pre-pandemic and still I have no hair. Best impulse purchase I’ve literally ever made. And I do mean impulse. I had my pants off for Brazilian laser and my aesthetician was like “we have a special going on, want anything else?” and I was like “sure go for it.”
Ok wait, I missed a question you may ask: does it hurt? Yes. But not a crazy amount. Way less than waxing, and again, I think of it as an investment! Beauty is pain, right? If you have a very low pain tolerance or no experience with waxing, take two ibuprofen half an hour before and you’ll be fine. And/or ask for a stress ball. I usually dig my nails in my palms if it really hurts. Underarms for me hurt wayyyy more than vagina or butt. Shins hurt second most.
If you got this far, I know you’re dying to know where I go. If you are in New York, I HIGHLY recommend Laser Bar and Spa for these reasons:
They are incredibly affordable as far as laser goes.
They always have Groupons! Literally. ALWAYS. First time customers only, though, so I recommend buying a lot in your first go!
They also always have specials for existing customers. That’s how they got me with the leg add-on.
The results are amazing. I have referred many friends there and they all have had fantastic results.
It’s centrally located and easy to get to (right in Herald Square).
Most importantly – mention my name and I can get a free session. I’m addicted! What should I get lasered next?
A few months ago I was scrolling through Instagram stories and an influencer I follow mentioned she was getting a one-on-one makeup lesson. I was totally intrigued. You guys know I have hair on lock. I can do my own, I can do bridal, I can do cornrows, boho and everything in between. But makeup? I can barely apply my own mascara.
I’ve tried learning how to do makeup on my own. After all, you can’t browse YouTube or TikTok without getting promoted a tutorial. But I don’t even know where to start. And let me tell you, makeup is EXPENSIVE! I can’t afford to buy a million products and try them out to see if they work. That is the approach I took with hair products – don’t ask me how many texture hairsprays I have. I have 5 curling wands. Anyway, I didn’t want to do that with makeup, and I really needed personalized attention. Unfortunately, the influencer I followed who got the lesson was in Los Angeles, which meant I needed to find myself a NYC-based makeup artist.
Three weeks ago, the makeup-gods shined upon me when a friend of a friend of mine actually won an Instagram contest from a makeup artist right here in NYC, Lucas Dean a.k.a. @makeupbylucas. I checked out his Instagram and it was EXACTLY what I was looking for: natural but chic. His IG bio says, “Serving that ‘you but better’ vibe.” Ummm YES. Naturally I checked out his website, but it didn’t mention lessons, so I slid into his DM’s like a creep. I explained my predicament, namely that I cannot do normal girl things like apply foundation, and he wrote back almost immediately. Definitely my kind of guy.
We discussed pricing and also what I was looking for: step-by-step instructions, an understanding of products in general, and how to elevate a look for night but keep it super natural. He mentioned that rosé goes very well with makeup lessons (I knew this was my guy) and I sent him a deposit via Venmo.
With my 4 weddings I have coming up in the next 4 months, I knew I needed to schedule this ASAP so I had time to practice. Thankfully, Lucas had a spot open the very next week between his many destination weddings (he has 40 weddings this year!!).
He arrived on time and with his entire kit in tow. He also had a rainbow rhinestone mask, extra points. He asked if I wanted him to keep his mask on, more extra points, but with the Covid rates so low in NYC, I felt it was important for me to see his full face so he could demonstrate on himself where to put different products. I explained that not only am I a huge sweater, but I was extremely nervous about full face makeup because my own wedding is on the beach in Mexico in May – I was scared to sweat it all off. He showed me an amazing photo of makeup he did for himself and told me he took a video of himself literally stepping in the shower in it, and none of it dripping off. That certainly helped allay my fear. I poured us some rosé and we got started.
We decided that although it would take longer (he charges by the hour), I preferred him to do a demo step by step where he did one side of my face, and then I attempted to do the same thing on the other side of my face while he coached me. We went step by step, me watching him do one side in a hand mirror (and also feeling it) and then him walking me through. Skincare, primer, eyeshadow, face (foundation, concealer, powder, bronzer, blush, highlighter), eyeliner and mascara, lipliner and gloss, set. That sounds like a lot of product, right?? I was scared, too. But I looked in the mirror and BAM. It looked AMAZING. He said he couldn’t even tell which side he did and I did! I think he was just being nice, but it really looked awesome.
As soon as he left (after we took a selfie), I took many selfies of myself. My makeup looked SO good!! It was perfect timing because I had a final meeting with my professor for a course I was taking, and I got to stare at myself on zoom for 40 minutes. Hopefully she couldn’t tell I was looking at myself, not her. I think the makeup looked incredibly natural. Chris hates me with any makeup on, but I did this for ME, right?
After my meeting, I opened a draft email to myself and tried to remember all of the steps and write them out in my own words. I understood what he said, and I think muscle memory will kick in eventually, but for now it’s good to have a cheat sheet. I went to Sephora and stocked up on all of the products he mentioned. I had been taking photos of them the entire time, and I had to go get the basics – I didn’t even own any brushes! Yikes. For someone with 20 different hair sprays, I was really lacking in the makeup department. While at Sephora, I DMed Lucas because the photos I took of two of the face products didn’t have the color on them. He wrote me back right away, and thankfully, somehow, he remembered which shades he had used on me, so I knew what to buy.
Me taking photos of all of the products. Note my slippers under the table!More photos, I still need to practice!
If you’ve read this far, I know you want to know the cost. He charges $200/hour for makeup lessons, and we went two hours. We probably could have finished in one hour if he had just done my makeup, but I really wanted a step-by-step tutorial and to try it myself. Was it worth $400? In my opinion, YES. But was it a splurge? Also YES. I never could have learned this without help. I see it as an investment! I’m hoping I now will know how to do my own makeup literally forever. I obviously need some practice, but I look forward to learning new tricks now that I have a base knowledge. Notice, I haven’t mentioned the price of the actual makeup. I spent about $250 on makeup after Lucas left, and that didn’t include eyeshadow, mascara, powder, bronzer or blush, which I already had. But brushes alone cost $50, and I needed to buy primers, concealer, foundation, eyeliner, setting spray, lip liner, and a natural lip gloss.
I’m super excited to practice this new skill, and between being able to do my own makeup AND hair, I am ready for my marathon of weddings coming up, starting with my brother’s, this weekend!!
Lucas took this one right after we finished. Look at that subtle eye!What do you think??Selfie 2 hours later in natural light from the window, clearly feeling myself!Me and Lucas, my new BFF (I wish!)
I DID IT!!! I didn’t drink for an entire month!! More than that, actually. I believe the last drink I had was on December 24th. Maybe for some people this would not be a feat worthy of all-caps and exclamation marks (plural). For me, it is. My sister and brother-in-law love to quote me for a time I was extremely inebriated in their presence and I famously, and very drunkenly, proclaimed “I don’t drink drugs or alcohol.” Well folks, I do, indeed drink alcohol. Quite a bit of it. Or I did, in my youth.
Do you remember 4lokos? There was a famous uproar in November 2010 about the incredibly toxic and delicious energy drink/alcoholic beverage, and the FDA literally banned the drink, then they reformulated it and rereleased it in January 2011. But what was going to happen to the old formula 4lokos? Well, my friends, I was not about to let it go to waste, I can tell you that much. I was in my first year of law school, so of course this energy drink/alcoholic beverage provided 2 things I needed BADLY: caffeine and severe inebriation to forget about my life choices. I went immediately to my neighborhood bodega, where everybody knew my name. Actually, he didn’t know my name, he called me “the hot chick from the law school.” I loved that guy. Anyway, I asked about the old 4lokos, which he told me they were required to take off the shelves. This piqued my interest. Off the shelves? But… not in the trash?? My main cashier buddy brought me to the back room where he showed me the two cases that were unfit for sale. To which I, of course, offered cold hard cash and told him I’d take it off of his hands. Needless to say, I was a very popular 1L for the rest of the school year.
Why did I tell you that longwinded story? Mostly to prove my alcoholism, but also to remind you how horrible law school is and that I needed illegal energy drinks to get through it. Anyway, I obviously digressed. But y’all, I never thought I’d be one to attempt Dry January. This year, however, I figured, why not. New year, new me, right? Also, Omicron made it so that I was staying in my apartment anyway, so it seemed like a good of a time as any.
I wish I could tell you that it was EXCRUCIATINGLY hard and that I am a super fun party animal and I missed out on so many things because I was choosing to forgo booze. But… that’s just not true. I think maybe I am super lame now in my old age. And boring. Or maybe all of my friends aren’t going out because of Covid plus it’s been very, very cold. I definitely would have had a drink on New Year’s Eve, but the one couple we were choosing to spend the evening with got Covid, so we ended up home alone watching Queer Eye. Don’t get me wrong, it was amazing. I made pigs in a blanket and cried my eyes out to Jonathan Van Ness. But I didn’t need a drink. And that’s what kickstarted my semi-decision not to drink for the month.
There were three times I was tempted to imbibe.
I almost dropped the ball early, on January 5th and 6th. Chris and I went to Texas to surprise his brother-in-law on his 50th birthday. First, we were upgraded to first class on the plane on the way there. FREE BOOZE! Then, we stayed in the house on Friday night and ordered in food and danced around the living room. Booze central! Then, the next day, there was a huge surprise party with multiple margarita machines. But… there was also Covid. And I didn’t want to take off my mask anywhere. So, I just decided to keep my mask on and chug water every now and again. I definitely did not want to be nauseous or hungover and smelling alcohol on my breath the next day in my mask on the flight home. I think I made the right decision.
I was ALMOST tempted on January 15th when I went to brunch with my friend after an Orangetheory class. Not only did I sweat a LOT and felt like I “deserved” a drink, but it was VERY cold. I’m talking, “feels like 8 degrees” and we were sitting outside, #becausecovid. I really wanted a spiked hot apple cider. But I got a coffee instead. My only hot coffee of the month. I am #TeamYearroundIcedCoffee, but that’s a topic for another day.
Lastly, I was almost tempted to break my streak last Saturday, January 29th, when I stayed inside all day and read an entire book on the couch. I had a scented candle going, and snow falling outside my window, and I really felt like I needed a coffee with Baileys and Kahlua to top off the day. But it was SO CLOSE to February. Instead, I settled for a seasonal pump of sugar free pumpkin syrup in my iced coffee and looked forward to the end of the month.
Honestly, being tempted to drink 3 times in 1 month is a huge transformation from my former self! I am basically a teetotaler now! And there’s one thing I definitely did not miss: hangovers. Sometimes nowadays I feel crappy for 2 full days after drinking! I guess that’s old age. Anyway, it was amazing to get good sleep every weekend, no heart palpitations, no cotton mouth in the morning, and no headaches! I will admit, last week I got a headache and I was PISSED. As I took out the Advil, I thought to myself, “I didn’t even get a night of dancing on the bar to feel it was worth this!” But, I was also productive every weekend day of the month. Well, maybe not the blizzard reading day, but that was a conscious decision. People often say quitting drinking makes your skin look great, but considering my constant N95 masks, I cannot vouch for this result. I would almost continue this non-drinking streak, but I am shopping for my wedding gown this weekend, and if I find one, I feel like I’ll need a celebratory drink for sure. Have any of you ever tried Dry January? My next 10+ month dry streak is likely going to be pregnancy-imposed. I think that one will be much tougher!
Let’s talk goals. January is almost over, which means the year is 1/12th over. 1/12 of my goals should be completed right? Not exactly. I’m in the middle of a course to become a Certified Salary Negotiation Specialist, and the other day the instructor said, “if an employer says yes to every one of your requests, you didn’t actually win. It means you probably left money on the table and should have asked for more. You want to actually get to ‘no’ because it means you got everything they had to offer.” That’s the approach I’m taking to my goals this year. Yes, I want to achieve my goals and I want them to be achievable, but I also want them to be a reach. If I achieve every single one of them, then I probably didn’t set them high enough. It’s ok if I don’t cross off every single one of them as long as I’m working toward them.
So what are my goals? As usual, I separated them into categories: Health, Work, Relationship, Finance, Other, and of course the all-important: Social Media.
For some reason, the health ones come easily to me. Maybe that means I’m not aspiring high enough. I don’t believe in calorie-counting or “dieting,” so my goals are generally more about fitness and wellness. My first goal: get 8 hours of sleep at least once a week. I kind of assume I will not achieve this. But I can try! One less Netflix binge-a-thon a week. Will that episode of Too Hot To Handle be there tomorrow? Yes. This sleep goal is even less likely to occur later in the year if I succeed in getting pregnant. More on that later.
Also related to health, last year, I set a goal not to order in food more than twice a week, which fits well into my finance category. Last year, I found it was an easily achievable goal, so I didn’t even mention it this year although it continues to be an ongoing goal. Sometimes when I come home from vacation and the fridge is empty, I fail here, but I have learned to stock up the freezer before I go, and first thing when I come home, I move chicken/salmon/turkey burgers etc. into the fridge.
With fitness goals, I love to work out, so I tend to do well in this area. But I set some serious reach goals here. This year I am setting the goals of 100 Orangetheory classes, 200 Peloton cycling and strength classes, and a 52-week Peloton streak. That’s right, I want to do at least one class every week on Peloton, but this streak includes sleep meditation and stretching. Even so, as for the 200 Peloton cycling and strength classes in addition to Orangetheory? That may be a reach. But I often do a 30 minute class and a 5-minute cooldown, and that counts as 2, so ya never know! I also set a goal to “try” yoga. I should have probably been more specific there. It’s January 28th and I have not yet “tried” it. I hateeee yoga. I’m so inflexible. Which makes me hate yoga. And I am so inflexible because I hate yoga. It’s a vicious cycle.
My work goal, as I already mentioned, is to become a Certified Salary Negotiation Specialist. I am happy to report that I am well on my way there. Considering there is a course deadline of February 17th, that is good news.
As for finance, I have a lot of goals. Many of them are based on retirement savings. I would like to max out my 403B and my Roth IRA. I may need to move some money around to do that, but I am going to try. I don’t have many other savings goals because I’m getting married this year, and even with a small wedding, it’s likely to make a dent in my net worth. My other finance goal is to understand American Express Points. I know this seems like a weird, small goal, but I want to be able to maximize or at least use them wisely. For years they have been pooling in my account, and in theory, if I can use them well, I have over $5,000 of points in there. I am trying to convince Chris to talk me through this whole concept, but he knows too much and I seem to get confused easily. Hopefully by the end of the year I will understand.
My relationship goals are BIG. I mean BIG. Like the biggest that a relationship goal can be. Wedding, kids, the whole thing. Well maybe not multiple kids. Actually, probably not any kids this year, because #science, but I would like to start attempting to have kids. That’s the fun part, right? Not necessarily the easy part, but I do need to take some initial steps, like taking my IUD out. Remember when that sucker disappeared? That was a fun blog post. Anyway, it’s still in there now, so that would be step #1. My other relationship goal is to have at least one date night per month. We failed on this one last year, but this month we already went to see Come From Away, which was a lot of fun. There’s nothing quite like grabbing a $10 cab to Broadway, ah, New York City life.
My Social Media goals are pretty lofty regarding my braiding business. I want to work on my TikTok skills because everyone says that is the best way to grow an audience. That means both posting regularly, increasing my followers, getting better at video transitions, all of it. I am in my 30’s so this is not easy. Just this week, I pulled something in my neck making one. I am clearly not the demographic of content creator they had in mind. But it’s kind of fun so I plan on continuing to try. My goal is 500 followers and posting at least once a week. I gained 9 followers last week, so I’m off to a good start. I also want to gain followers on Instagram (5000 would be ideal, but a reach), which means posting more reels. Everything is about video these days! I also want to continue to post on my blog more. Ideally twice a month. January is going well, since this is my third post, but I tend to fall off on posting later in the year. I’m going to work on it! You all need to comment and keep me accountable.
My last category of goals is “Other,” which means leftovers. And not necessarily the good kind like lukewarm pizza or cold Chinese food. My first miscellaneous goal is to make the bed every day. Especially now that the Peloton is in the bedroom, I HATE getting on the bike and seeing a mess. Plus, I’m hoping that getting into a made bed will entice me to sleep earlier, helping me reach my 8 hours of sleep goal. Another random goal: go to 3 Broadway shows. So far, I’ve been to one and it’s January, so it’s going well! I keep entering the lottery to get cheap seats and I win probably 10% of the time. Not bad odds! I also have a goal of traveling to two new countries. Considering the amount of weddings I have this year, and the hope to get pregnant, I’m not sure if this will happen. Maybe we will go on a honeymoon? But maybe not. We’ll see. My last goal is to make $2000 braiding hair. Considering I was supposed to have my first 2022 client tonight and she canceled because she has Covid, it’s not looking good. We’ll see.
Those are my goals! Do you have any lofty or not-lofty ones you want to share? Let me know in the comments.
We did it!! That’s right, after successfully skirting the “when’s the wedding” question for 23 months, we finally set a date! Woohooo!! That means I can start planning the day I have been dreaming about for my entire life!! **record scratch**
I have not been planning this day for even the 2 years we’ve been engaged. Hell, I haven’t even been planning it for a month! In fact, I really don’t care at all. And that, my friends, is why I am the worst bride ever.
When I not-so-slyly mentioned in my last blog that I was officially getting married soon, my friend suggested I blog about the journey. And she’s not wrong, so many brides are all over the internet blogging about their wedding planning. There’s a girl who went viral with her own Instagram account solely about planning her wedding – she has 264K followers! Here’s the issue, I don’t want to write about it because I have nothing to say, I simply don’t care. My friend said I should blog about just that, because there must be some people out there who feel similarly. So, here you go.
I want to start this off with a disclaimer: It’s not that I don’t care about being married. I’m actually very excited to have a partner for FOREVER so that I never have to be on dating apps again. I’m excited to have someone who can’t leave me without a tumultuous legal battle. Who is my built-in accountant and financial advisor to explain the 5/24 rule of credit card churning. To sleep next to me every night. To bring me Gatorade when I get food poisoning. And ibuprofen when I have a hangover. To start a family with! (In that order. Just kidding).
The marriage, I’m excited for. The wedding, not so much. I feel like I already did the hard part. I found a guy who can put up with me! And not only did he agree to be with me for the rest of his life, he actually SUGGESTED it. With a big diamond! I already won. We’ve been together for 6.5 years and we’ve been living together for 5. So like, what’s with this whole rigamarole?
I know this is an unpopular opinion. So let me explain.
Some of this is about money. And I know a lot of couples, especially on the interwebs, will say “THIS IS THE ONE DAY YOU SPLURGE! MONEY DOESN’T MATTER!” Ummm, maybe that is true… until the credit card bill comes. Would I feel differently about this whole wedding thing if I had unlimited funds? Probably. But I don’t, so it doesn’t make sense to think that way. And yes, my fiancé works in finance and yes, he could probably afford to splurge on a wedding, but why? For one day? I have friends who have spent over $100K on a wedding. The average is around 50K and that’s not even in New York, which always adds additional sticker shock. I feel like the main driver of wedding prices is usually the bride, at least stereotypically. And since I’m the one with less funding and I don’t care, I feel like I can’t push for this princess wedding concept. Which leads me to my next point.
What’s with this whole “princess” thing? The ball gown. The horse and carriage. The “turning-into-a-pumpkin-at-midnight.” Ok, maybe not that last part. But honestly, it’s kind of weird and creepy. I am 34 years old. I have known for at least two and a half decades that princesses aren’t real. And when they are, they are ostracized from their families and do exposés with Oprah. This is not a goal I am looking to achieve. Although, I’d love to meet Oprah… if anyone has the hook-up. Why are there girls out here trying to pretend to be a fairytale character in their 30’s? No offense, but, that’s weird (obvious offense).
For me, ever since we got engaged, I said that if we were going to have a wedding I cared about 3 things:
People should have enough food. Not necessarily AMAZING, Michelin-starred food, but I don’t want anyone hungry.
Unlimited alcohol. It’s not a fun party if you’re paying for your own booze or if there isn’t enough booze.
Good music that people can dance to. Dancing is a MUST.
Since I made that list, I have added one more thing: AMAZING HAIR. For myself, duh. All brides have told me you are allowed one “thing.” Mine is my hair. For obvious reasons. Namely, Instagram content. Follow me on BraidInManhattan! For this, I am pulling out all the stops. I’m buying extensions. Getting my hair colored to match. Flying in my hair-bestie and internet friend from Florida to do my hair.
The rest of the stuff to me is noise. Bridesmaids? Meh sure. Matching dresses? Definitely don’t care. Flowers? Meh. Bouquet? Don’t care. First look? Sure. Or not. Don’t care. Ring bearers? Don’t care. Toasts? If you want to talk, great. If you don’t, also fine. Rehearsal dinner? Meh. Flavor of cake? Don’t even like cake. Bridal gown? I feel like that one deserves a blog of its own. I have thoughts. Stay tuned.
This is why I have deemed myself the worst bride ever. We have picked a venue and we have a date. We have not planned much else. Over the weekend we discussed a registry. We feel like we don’t need anything additional in our home. We have lived together for 5 years! Whatever we needed, we have purchased. And I always feel weird about the whole concept of a “honeymoon fund.” I’ve never asked people for money before, so why would I do it, or feel we deserve it, because Chris and I are signing a contract? It makes no sense.
I feel like a lot of the wedding hype is a vestige of the past, when a woman was leaving her family to swear herself over to a man. It was a huge step. For me, it’s a minor one. I’m much more excited to have kids. If you want to send me adorable onesies or money for diapers then, feel free. The wedding part I’m mostly doing for my family. And for Chris. My best friend is actually getting married a month after me and if I’m being honest, I’m almost more excited for that. There’s no pressure and I already know she will be super happy.
This brings me to my final point: the additional events. WHY. A few years ago, I was invited to a friend’s wedding (not local). Then, to two separate bridal showers (one local, one not). Then, to a bachelorette party (semi local, but $1000/person). This is literally how I went into credit card debt. No single person should require this much celebrating on their behalf. It’s inane. My mom wants to have a wedding shower for me to celebrate, and also to have something semi-local for her friends. I said fine. But only because she is planning it! And I don’t want to invite any of my friends who aren’t local because at my age, we have all done enough of this. I don’t want to be responsible for anyone’s financial ruin. If it makes my mom happy, it makes me happy. The end.
Recently, my friend asked me if I wanted to do a bachelorette party. I shrugged. Obviously, I’m always happy to go on a trip with her. We‘ve had a blast together in Turks and Caicos, Costa Rica, Hawaii, Vancouver, Spain, and Portugal, and none of those required a wedding as an excuse. There’s no need to make an excuse to travel together. And especially there is no need to force people to travel in honor of my relationship milestones.
I will say this – I love the beach, and I love a party, and I love my family and friends. And I love Chris. The rest doesn’t matter. If anything changes, I promise to keep you in the loop. But I may just show up here in photos in a few months with a tan and an additional ring on my finger, and that’s fine, too.
Today is my 4 year blogiversary! It’s also been 13 months to the day since I started working from home. Somehow, I’ve never talked about it here on the blog. I talked about living with to-be-in-laws, and about being engaged and quarantined, but not the actual experience of working from home.
If you had asked me on March 16, 2020 how I felt about it, I would have said no. No way. Absolutely not. I’m a VERY social person and I love my coworkers and I love the feeling of having lunch with someone else. Also, I cannot even IMAGINE being in the same house as my fiancé 24 hours a day.
But now??? I’m not sure if I feel that way. As people get vaccinated slowly (more on that another day), workplaces are starting to talk about the transition back into in-person work and honestly? I’m not excited about it. I still miss my coworkers, but I kind of love working from home.
First of all, the commute. I love the subway. Really, I do. It’s quick, efficient, and it’s an inexpensive means of transportation. But when you put the experience of being sweaty and hurried, and pushed against 1000 other sweaty and hurried people in a cattle car versus the experience of literally rolling out of bed to the kitchen for coffee and a laptop?? I mean, I think we can all agree that the latter sounds more appealing. I mentioned the coffee, but also the breakfast. I think I have made eggs 95% of the days we have been home. To be honest, I also made eggs 95% of the days I commuted to work, but it usually involved being late, eating while standing up in the kitchen and packing a bag, and feeling like even putting my plate in the dishwasher was going to make me later. Now? I can wait to eat breakfast until after my 9 am meeting. Or after my 10 am meeting. Or whenever!! And the dishes can be put in the dishwasher while I’m on a call. No one can see me and I’m in my house!
Also, shoes. Don’t get me wrong, I love shoes. I have approximately 20 pairs of boots. But this year I discovered the joy of socks. And slippers. Or just no shoes at all. When all you do is pace around your bedroom on phone calls, real shoes are not necessary. In fact, I instituted a no-shoes-in-the-apartment policy. It’s easy because we leave so infrequently! Also, I mostly only wear sneakers so our shoe rack by the door can remain half full.
When you saw this blog title, you probably assumed I would talk about working out. You would have been correct. It’s the best part. Even before I got my Peloton, I was able to do workouts midday. Whether that was a step class during my lunch hour or a quick run when the sun was brightest and I could get the tannest, the fact that I could go home to shower before my next call made it lifechanging. Now, I sometimes do a 20-minute arm workout between calls. Or a 5-minute core workout before I make lunch. Sometimes, I go on a 30-minute run and I don’t even go home. I just continue to my next phone call and go on a low-impact walk. Which leads me to my next discovery – taking phone calls outside. I really hope that this continues even when they force me back to the office. Pre-covid, I spent hours of my day on the phone. When Covid began, all those calls shifted to zoom which was incredibly exhausting. Now, we are finally transitioning back to the age of phone calls, and the ability to go on walks while on work calls is amazing. I focus more on the conversation when my legs are moving, and I can breathe fresh air.
And finally, my sweet fiancé. I haven’t been without him for a full 24 hours in over a year. I used to travel without him for work and play, but now, it’s been 16 months since we have slept apart! I am going to go to my parents’ house for 5 days next month and it’ll be so strange not to have him there. That leads me to my last point – working from home means I can work from anywhere. Obviously, I took full advantage of that at the beginning of the pandemic when we moved temporarily (for 6 months) to Texas. And unfortunately, the challenge and lack of safety of travel has affected the real extent to which I have been able to take advantage of this. But I hope that in the future, our work environment is more flexible and we will have certain times in the office and certain times remote, so I can travel to different places, even if it means working for 8 hours and then exploring a new place in the evening. This flexibility of working without being strapped to a desk is an exciting new possibility.
How do you guys feel about working from home? Hate it? Love it? Scared to go back but also excited? Let me know in the comments.
Have you ever thought to yourself, “I have too much time on my hands and I saw this cool thing on the internet so I’m going to try it!” And then you totally failed?
Well, I’m not sure if you have, but I know for a fact there are some other people who have – there’s a whole show on Netflix called Nailed It that is based on this premise.
Since we moved into a new, much bigger apartment, we needed to furnish it and didn’t have money but had nothing but time, so I decided to try my hand at some DIY. Spoiler Alert: I did not nail it.
The goal: obtain some cheap or free pieces either from stooping or the Buy Nothing Facebook group (more on that another time), and then refinish them to be gray to match our blue/gray living space area theme.
More specifically: sand, gray stain, and finish a shelf to hold our stemless wine glasses and serve as wall art, a media center, and a coffee table.
Things started out pretty well. I found this awesome shelf on the street that my sister stored for me for a day. Free.
I saw a media center with GREAT bones on Buy Nothing, and paid Stoober $40 to transport it. Chris and I had to take it down 4 flights of stairs, which left me sore for 4 days, but #worthit.
I found this VERY cool coffee table that looked like it was made of crates in our building, that someone was throwing out. It had wheels, and totally fit in the theme of our décor (if it had been gray). Free.
Shelf on the Street (Like Elf on a Shelf but free)
Media Center
Coffee Table/Crates
Look how cool!
We had random furniture all over our apartment while I got up the nerve to go to the paint store. It took me a week. I finally swallowed my pride after doing some preliminary googling, and I asked the guy at Benjamin Moore to “please speak to me like I am a stupid person who has never done any DIY before… because I haven’t.”
The man could not have been nicer. He explained sand paper, and told me I would be much better off getting a hand sander. He explained protective eyewear. He explained paint thinner for cleaning purposes (I still don’t totally understand this), and also helped me pick a gray stain. I had taken photos of all of the items and showed him, but since I didn’t purchase them and couldn’t be 100% sure if they were wood or laminate, I knew there was risk involved.
Thankfully, my brother-in-law had a hand sander I could borrow, so I didn’t need to purchase that, either. I watched 5 YouTube videos on sanding and loading spring-load hand sanders, then I put down some drop clothes and got to work. I decided to start with the smallest project, the interesting shelf thingy (very technical term).
Look at that hope and optimism in my eyes.
My instagram story showed my fear.
Are Ray-Bans considered “eye protection?”
“Coming Along” was optimistic.
When I took a break to look outside…. then gave up.
I had our air filter on high, the windows open, and our vacuum on hand. But WOW. It was LOUD. I was very worried about pissing off our brand-new neighbors. Also, despite the drop cloth, it was still going EVERYWHERE! About 10 minutes in, I went downstairs to investigate the possibility of using an outdoor outlet. Unfortunately, both outdoor spaces were closed due to snow/ice, and the only other outlet was at the entrance to our building. I asked the doorman and he said I should probably pass it by the super. I gave up on that plan and went back to my living room.
After sanding, I tried to clean up all the residue, and went on to step #2. Staining. Well, guys. I messed up. I used the FINISH. But only on one half of one side before I noticed, and thankfully, it was the top that no one would really see unless they were super, super tall. After switching to the actual stain, I proceeded. It didn’t look gray. I double checked the can. Gray. I waited. Still not gray. I waited overnight. Still not gray.
I added real googles for the paint/stain fumes.
The Lineup
Me double checking that it does, in fact, say GRAY.
48 hours later, the house STILL smelled like fumes and sawdust and the shelf was… you guessed it… NOT GRAY.
I decided to take my mind off of it by taking a Peloton class. (Yes, I will mention Peloton in every blog. I promise a full post on it soon).
All of a sudden, my entire neck broke out in what can only be described as a massive rash. It was bright red. Swollen. SO itchy I could barely finish the class. Of course, since I’m including this detail in my DIY blog, you already are guessing it’s from the project, but at the time, I was completely flummoxed. Remember, I hadn’t done anything with the project in almost 2 days! I thought I became spontaneously allergic to the peloton bike. Or my towels. I switched to 100% cotton tshirts. I tried working out in a different room. Nothing worked. I continued to break out in a serious neck rash every day when I sweat. I stayed up late, night after night, until my googling came up with this tidbit:
Toxins: Sometimes, exposure to toxins in the environment may be enough to cause an itchy neck. Working with chemicals or small particles such as wood fiber may increase the risk of irritation.
TADA solution. Sorta. I went about trying to figure out how to get rid of the toxins. Step 1: get rid of the paint. I gave it away on Buy Nothing. Step 2: vacuum EVERYTHING. The bookshelf. The rug. The couch. The windowsill. Step 3: clean out and empty the vacuums. Step 4: wait.
If you were wondering about the shelf and you read this entire blog hoping for an “after” photo, I apologize. It does not exist. I threw away the shelf. I took the media center back out to the street. I sold the coffee table for $40 on FB marketplace to try and make up some of the money lost on supplies and stoobering. Unfortunately, no amount of money made up for 7 days of neck rash. Eventually, it did go away. Meanwhile, you can find me on Amazon/Wayfair looking for a NEW coffee table that requires zero skill from me.
It’s January, which means RESOLUTION TIME!! Now, I understand it’s January 21st so I’m a bit behind, but if you’ve been following along for a while, you’d know I actually hate resolutions. What I do love, is goal-setting. In the past few years, I’ve been keeping a list of goals in my bullet journal. Flipping to them periodically has helped keep me focused.
Unfortunately approximately 80% of my 2020 goals were unachievable because, well… ya know. Did I work out at 10 new fitness studios? No. Did I attend 100 bootcamp classes? No. Did I visit 4 new countries? Nope, not even one. Did I spend less than $400 on buying lunch for work? Sorta… because I didn’t actually GO to work for 5/6 of the year.
Anyway, I prefer not to talk about all of the goals I didn’t achieve. Yesterday was the beginning of a fresh start for our nation and for me. We are now focused on positivity. Therefore, I’d like to recap some of the amazing moments and achievements from 2020. Not all were planned, but I’m still proud of them! I invite you all to celebrate your 2020 accomplishments, big and small.
I Got Promoted
This is huge! Technically, I got the promotion in 2019, but my boss retired at the beginning of 2020 and I took on the reigns of the entire department alone. If you didn’t know, I work in career services so to say that my job was tough during 2020 when EVERYONE was seeking work and facing furloughs and pay cuts? Well, that would be the understatement of the century. It was hard. There were days when I felt 100 hours behind. But I did it! I was even rewarded with a raise.
I Got Engaged
Again, HUGE. Did we pick a date yet? No. Are we planning a wedding at all? Also no. Does it make living in a 500 square foot apartment with my fiancé any easier? No again. But I do have a gorgeous rock on my hand, and it looks FABULOUS in photos. Sometimes I look at it sparkling in the fluorescent lights and it makes me smile.
I Learned How to Do My Own Manicures
This may not be on par with the engagement and promotion, but it’s pretty darn cool. No one ever sees them IRL, but I do get comments about them sometimes on Zoom. Also, I started a 4th Instagram for my nail photos, ManisInManhattan. I was looking for some home hobbies, and I found one plus I learned a new skill. It’ll probably save me money someday… after the initial investment of buying all the supplies.
Engagement night!
Check out my nails, ring, AND purple hair!
Different nails, but same gorgeous ring.
I Achieved Net Zero
Speaking of saving money, somehow I achieved Net Zero. This is a massive feat if you know anything about my student loans. Not only did I achieve Net Zero, I surpassed it by many many miles. How? By barely spending any money. Getting a promotion. Not eating out. Not traveling. Not paying student loans thanks to Covid forbearance. Compound interest in my 401K (and maxing it out for the very first time!). Sure, I wish I had been traveling and eating at restaurants instead of saving money. But since I couldn’t, I am excited to have a much bigger pot for compound interest for the coming years.
I Kept Up with My Bullet Journal
In 2018 I gave up and swore off my Bujo. Then I tried it again in 2019 and liked it a bit more but also slacked. In 2020, I thought it was important to keep up with journaling for my sanity, to mark the difference in days, the passage of time, the seemingly endless weeks and months. Now, I appreciate my own tenacity because someday I’ll be able to look back on this crazy year and understand my headspace. I wasn’t perfect 100% of the time. Sometimes a week went by when I didn’t write at all. But in general, I kept up and made it 148 pages to December 31st. Not only did I use it as a journal, but it let me track lots of stuff like these last four achievements.
I Published 26 Blogs
My goal was historically 2/month, so I achieved that. Also, it was not easy to write blogs when you DID NOTHING AND STAYED INSIDE EVERY DAY. Hopefully I didn’t bore you guys too much. Mommy, are you still there? Are you my only follower?
Some weeks I kinda fell behind, but that’s ok!
26 blogs!
I Watched Movies I Had Wanted to See
Last year, I started the year with a massive list of movies to watch in my Bullet Journal. When I heard we were going to quarantine, I ordered a DVD player from Amazon, and I took 4 DVDs out from the library. I even brought them with me to Texas. I slowly made it through 84 new movies. That’s right, 84. I got through many on my list, like the Godfather, Casablanca, One Child Nation, Steel Magnolias, Frozen, and My Best Friend’s Wedding. And also watched some movies I didn’t plan to watch but loved nonetheless, like Ugly Dolls, The Princess and the Frog, The Social Dilemma, and 21 Jump Street.
My to-watch list. Look at all those check marks.
I only had set aside one page for movies…
I ended up moving on to 3!
I Read 61 Books
That’s right guys, SIXTY ONE. 20,665 pages according to Goodreads. Back in 2018, I set myself a goal to read 4 non-fiction books a year. In 2020 I read 14! I also discovered audiobooks. I mean, I knew what they were before 2020, but I was never able to focus on them. In 2020, I took so many long walks that audiobooks were the perfect way to escape my endless thoughts and Twitter doomscrolling. I absolutely love them now and changed my reading tracker for this year in my bullet journal to track these.
Note, one book is missing from here from March, woops! (It was I Like to Watch and it was terrible)
I Discovered New Ways to Move My Body
It’s no secret I like to work out. Unfortunately, my two workouts of choice were teaching Spin classes and attending group bootcamp classes. Both of these were not options in quarantine. So, I had to adjust. First, my mindset. Maybe one day I couldn’t motivate myself to do a burpee. Ok, NO days I could motivate myself to do a burpee. But at least I could go for an hour-long walk. I got to know the Texas subdivision very well. I listened to podcasts. I listened to music. I zoned out. According to my Fitbit, I only didn’t make it to 10,000 steps/day 14 days all year! And 6 of those days were pre-Covid! That means I walked 10K+ steps 352/366 days. 96% of the year. If you don’t count the days pre-Covid, it’s 285/293… 97%! I walked a LOT. 5,019,509 steps according to my Fitbit. Five million, nineteen thousand, five hundred and nine.
I also danced. I discovered the freedom of moving my body to music. Dancing like no one was watching because… no one was. Well, Chris’s nephews sometimes but they already thought I was crazy. I did so much dance cardio; it became my escape. I’m moving next week, and I’m not sure if I’ll be able to continue my dancing because I’ll officially have downstairs neighbors, but I’ll keep you posted. I did buy a Peloton so I’ll have to tell you all about that, too!
So many things to blog about. The Peloton, the move, the new apartment, maybe I’ll beat my 26-blog-post record.
What did you all achieve in 2020? Anything unexpected? New skills? Tell me in the comments!
That’s a lot of steps!
Look at all that purple.
Look where the green ends, no biking! Also check out 9 months of no strength training. Woops.
Money is on a lot of our minds nowadays. Some people are worried how to pay bills this month because the government discontinued unemployment checks. Others of us are on Amazon every day buying our happiness to our doorstop. Either way, one thing is for sure: all of our spending habits have changed this year.
I am incredibly lucky to still have a job, and despite losing all of the income I was bringing in by teaching at the gym and braiding hair, I am still saving more than ever because I can barely spend any money. I’m cooking meals at home, having drinks at home, making coffee at home, not traveling anywhere… basically everything I spent money on BC (Before Covid), I can’t do anymore!
This change in spending habits came at a very interesting time, right after I got engaged. You may remember that my now-fiancé was the first person to whoop my finances into shape in 2017. He works in finance and needed to give me a crash course on how to be fiscally responsible. Now that we are talking about combining our lives and finances FOREVER, we talk about money a lot!
Back in 2017, he was horrified that I had credit card debt (not to mention my sky-high pile of student loans from law school), and he quickly taught me the importance of a retirement account. Also, I didn’t understand the concept of a savings account. I mean I did, but I didn’t have any money to put in said account.
I posted a blog in April 2017 to talk about my newfound addiction to mint.com. I finally gave in to my dad and boyfriend’s pleas to start budgeting and tracking money, and I became obsessed. At that time, I was checking my account every day. Now, it’s a little bit less, but it’s still fun to check! There’s something about watching the graphs populate that makes it fun to save. There is some science behind this; it’s all about the gamification. There are studies proving that this can work, and there are many apps that have been created specifically with this in mind. I love to look at the Trends tab with performance graphs and pie charts, and I love receiving the emails congratulating me about my increased credit score. The whole thing is fun. And since there’s nothing left in 2020 that’s fun, I was checking my mint the other day when I realized something… I’M ALMOST AT NET ZERO. That’s right, my net worth is approaching equilibrium. I told my fiancé and he said that when I get to net zero, we can throw an “Emily is Worth Nothing Party.”
Amazing News: I think I’ll get to Net Zero in a month or two.
Bad News: I was SO PSYCHED about the prospect of a party I didn’t realize that Covid would still be going on, so it was likely to be a party where I wear a party hat in the house and drink alone. Meh.
Anyway, I know you want to know how I got here. When I started using mint in September 2016, I had a net worth of $-107,000. At my lowest in November 2016, my net worth was $-111,612. Talk about daunting. I didn’t understand how I would ever dig myself out of 100K of debt by sticking to a $20/month coffee budget. You may recall my wake-up call was when my dad asked if I needed a payment plan to pay for my $120 state taxes. I was determined to try and get out of debt. Some of these tips and tricks you may be able to use, and some, I realize may not be applicable.
Track your spending. This is pretty straightforward. Over time, tracking spending does change spending habits. For me, when I realized my $100 bar tab would show up at the end of the month on my mint, I thought twice before ordering another round.
Get a roommate. I know, this seems dumb but BY FAR the most expensive thing each month in New York is rent. It’s astronomical. I never had a crazy expensive apartment, but I saved $500/month when I moved in with my boyfriend (now fiancé). The other day I added up how much I’ve saved on rent since we moved in together: $21,000 (42 months x $500). That’s a lot of moolah. Maybe you can’t move in with a boyfriend, but seriously consider how much of your paycheck you’re spending on rent before you sign a lease.
Credit Card Churning, baby! This is a complicated concept for some, but if you’re spending money anyway, spend it in a way that earns you money back! (Spend more and save more! HA) I wrote a whole blog on it before, so I won’t reiterate, but I have probably saved $10K-$15K in travel in the past 4 years by solely using points.
Set Goals. You guys know I’d rather set a goal than “make a resolution,” but SMART goals work! I had 4 financial goals in 2019, and by putting pen to paper and looking at them periodically, it kept me honest and committed. I surpassed them all! Make sure they are attainable, so you aren’t dejected.
If you have student loans, try to understand repayment options and interest rates. Again, I wrote an entire blog series on my student loans, so I won’t say it again. But it’s important to know the interest rates of your loans so you can pay off the high interest ones first. Maybe combine it with #3 and get a credit card to pay off some of them.
Take advantage of any retirement contribution from work. I am super guilty of NOT doing this. When my fiancé found out my work had a matching program that I was not taking advantage of, he literally texted me the next day at work to ask if I had signed up yet. And that means a lot because he does NOT text me during the day (we’ve worked on his texting; it’s gotten better since 2017). If your employer is matching any percentage of your contribution, take advantage. That is literally FREE money.
Advocate for yourself at work. I’m talking about raises. Have you been at the same job for years without pay increases? You are your own best advocate. You need to figure out how to get compensated for your work. Is this easy? Hell no! It’s super hard. I coach people every day on how to ask for raises, and it’s still not easy for me to do! If you are very lost on where to start, I recently listened to a podcast with Ramit Sethi, author of I Will Teach You To Be Rich, where he laid out a specific plan on how to speak to a supervisor about a raise.
I did all of the things I listed above, and more. Between lack of travel this year and decreased all-around spending, I am almost at Net Zero! Do I still have student loans? You betcha. Almost $100K still. But my retirement is growing, I have a 401K, a Roth IRA, a savings account, the whole deal. And more than the numbers, I feel like I’m in control of my finances for the first time in my life. Do any of you guys set financial goals? What’s the hardest part about it? Have you had any big achievements? What do you do to celebrate?
